Comments

mat
Reply

I lost £3000 recently in 3 sessions that lasted an hour together, it will take me till December to get that back through work, I feel nauseous right now just thinking about it, even though it was winnings it really were not I am down at least £20-30 grand over the years and to someone making a low wage that’s crippling.
Gambling is stupid and its sickness it makes you miserable and poor. There are no winners on the roulette and slots its impossible to beat you might win here and there but its nowhere near what you lose on them over long run. I said to myself I will keep the £3k I had in cash and I went in and the machine turned off my brain and I lost everything, its always like this I don’t f****** know whats happening I get in a trance and my hand shakes and puts note after note into the machine till there is nothing left, I hate it I feel so weak, I am a embarrassment I hate myself. Why can’t I learn from my mistakes and keep doing this?

loser
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Mat this happens to everyone, I feel the same trance and sometimes the next day I feel like I hadn’t even been there when I try to retrace exactly where I walked around the casino. Even when I get a urge all logic and lesson’s learnt to try and override the urge go out the door and I cannot think straight and end up at the casino. The trick is to lock your money up and have no access, how will you go then? You won’t go! So when your thinking logically lock that money up because chance’s are you will end up in the trance zone and if you have access to money then your surely likely to gamble.

Jane
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Sorry to hear that, Mat. I am only on a low wage too, so it makes it even harder to get the money back. I’ve had to do double shifts to claw back some money, then the car broke…it never ends. There is always something going wrong, needing repair or bills through the door. My first thought is to gamble to get the money, but we can’t keep doing this. It’s not normal.

We have conditioned ourselves to need more out of life, not necessarily more money, just more excitement, more highs. We don’t content ourselves with everyday life, it seems dull and subdued, so gambling seems exciting and we get a kick out of it.

I gamble mostly with a clear head, to start with. Sometimes I gamble when I am upset too. I know what I am doing, and have control at the start, but then when things don’t go my way, I am like a spoilt child. I can’t take it. I throw money in like it doesn’t even matter. I will not stop until I either win, or there is nothing left. I get in a trance too, not when I am winning, only when I am losing. It controls me, and makes me lose touch with reality. There is no thought, no hesitation. All plans to control what I spend, goes out the window. I should record myself and watch it back because it might wake me up to see the mess I get in when I start losing. I don’t function and I have no self awareness. It’s robotic and scary to know how much you zone out. It’s like you’re possessed.

Would do us all good, I think, to see ourselves in this state.

NIK
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As I half expected, despite not being able to download any more exam marking over the weekend it hasn’t finished and more have been available. From last week until completion we are now getting £7.50 per script uprated from £5 ( I had already done over 40 at this rate), but even at this increased rate I have worked out I would need to mark 87 more scripts to earn what I have lost with the weekend’s gambling, and when tax is taken into consideration this means it is well over 100 – that is around a week’s work to earn back what I lost in about 2 hours.
This really brings the stupidity of gambling on slots into perspective.

Gambling is for idiots – let ‘em starve.

Now back to the exam marking and once again my book will haver to be put on hold.

Joanne
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Well if it ain’t NIK the snob. Barely acknowledged the rest of us when he was riding high with his gamble free days but now he’s relapsed our company (well probably not mine!) is good enough for him again! Only comes to get his wounds licked and Mat. But then Jane’s good at licking wounds and arses as long as it keeps her popular! She changes more than a chameleon.

And as for Kate, time you grew up! If your father had outlived your mother, you’d have probably been walking hand in hand with your father no giving a flying f**k as to how your brothers might have felt left out. What you win on the roundabouts you lose on the swings!

NIK
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Not sure what’s going on here and surprised to receive this from someone who has always been extremely friendly towards me. The internet and / or gambling certainly has a peculiar effect in people.

During my gamble free months obviously I didn’t look at this site that much but did pop in occasionally. The reason I didn’t post much was because I had nothing to say apart from I still hadn’t gambled which could have been irritating to some people. Then I explain how I lapsed and receive an insult – very peculiar!

For the record the exam marking has now finally finished and I managed 62 at the higher rate which should bring me £465 before tax, under £400 after, which is still well short of the £650 I lost.
Altogether the exam marking will have made me around £2500 this year as I have done more than ever (nearly 600!), and the bookies aren’t going to get another penny of it.

Anyway I hope you get over whatever it is that is bugging you, Joanne and return to the nice person I thought you were.

Best wishes

LOSER
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Hi Everyone,
I just read NIK’s comment regarding the machines not winning anymore. I agree I think they have adjusted the % factor on when the machine will go off. Back in the day if I managed a $5 bet on a feature I was sure to get $300+ but now your lucky to be paid $100. I think also what factor’s here is that as we become more frustrated and addicted our bets become more irrational betting higher and higher so we go through he money quicker so if we put $100 in a machine betting $2 a spin thats 50 pushes and we are out, but before becoming so addicted we might bet less and get 110 pushes with that $100 therefore giving us a better chance to get a feature or win something as we are playing longer with the same amount of money. Also back in the day we were capable of taking our winnings out and leaving but now it’s not so easy.
Has everyone noticed as soon as NIK finished all his work and had free time that is when the relapse occurred? So this is a key factor …..keep busy……

I think once addicted always addicted the aim is to stay away for as long as possible and not have easy access to large amounts of money.

Mat I agree with you a large win can only let this beast of a addiction get stronger this is how I got addicted in the first place, time will tell I guess but I will really try to stop now. Day 1 for me is today.

Jane I have gambled for about 19 – 20 years so don’t feel bad thinking 9 years of your life have been lost. It’s strange I do not look at it this way I look at all the money I have lost instead.

Joanne Joanne where have you gone? Hmmmmmm

Anyway maybe we should all do a check in for 7 days, check in saying your gamble free and what day your up to?

NIK
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Hi Loser,

Yes another thing now with every new account you open they demand id documents before you can withdraw. They reckon it’s law. They don’t tell you this clearly until you try to make that initial withdrawal, although it’s buried somewhere deep in the small print. Although it could be argued it’s no big deal, it’s just one more hurdle you have to jump to prevent you withdrawing quickly and to encourage you to lose any winnings.

It’s also noticeable that they don’t demand id when you deposit, thereby proving it’s just another con, the same as all their stings attached bonus offers are.

Jane
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Loser, this is exactly right. When we were just putting in a few quid, our money obviously lasts longer, and we allow the machine ‘time’ to throw out a win. As our addiction grew, we are no longer content with small wins, simply because we have already lost so much, so in order to make a win worthwhile, we have to bet more, so we are out of cash much quicker, often before the machine pays out.

It may just be the way it was, I d’know, but when I used to put a quid on a number, they flashed up all the time on roulette. Then when my bets grew, it always went either side and around all my usual numbers, like it knew.

Like Mat, I once got through several thousand pounds without a win on the roulette. This should have been pretty much impossible with the way I play the table, but it happened THREE times on each consecutive relapse. I changed website and gambled with new places but kept my so called lucky numbers, yet still NOTHING out of yet another thousand? I lost £3,700 in three sessions, and not one number came up. Bear in mind, I play 44% of the board with varying amounts on each number. It didn’t even try to encourage me to keep playing, the money was just gone without one single glimmer of hope.

I got so frustrated, deposited the last £10 in my account, because I had a feeling it would happen now, because I didn’t have enough money left to make a difference with. I think I wanted to get angry so I would stop gambling, so I just threw out a bit of small change on the numbers, and what do you know, my numbers came up. I won £9.70 on number 20 where earlier it had £50 on it. I slammed the laptop shut and you can only imagine what came out of my mouth! I don’t even think I collected the winnings! Did the job though, I got to 172 days gamble free after that ordeal!

Could it be that we notice we are not winning more now, because we have large bets on and so the loss is emphasized more? And also, because it just adds to the ton of money we have already lost? D’know. All I know is that it’s really hard to get any luck these days so I think they are targeting the addicted because they know that we won’t stop, where others would walk away.

NIK
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Afraid I lapsed again today. Stuck £400 on in a vain bid to win back the £250 I lost yesterday. Played both Cleopatra games, Wheel of Fortune, Rainbow Pick and Mix and a couple of others, winning bonses of £200, £160 and £75 of course I was well down before getting the bonuses with the result that I never got above £460. Three times I reached this amount, but never got anywhere near getting £250 back, consequently I kept spinning until inevitably it was all gone. Now done £650 over the past two days, almost a third of my exam marking earnings.

I’m really gutted because I thought I was over chasing losses, throwing away hard earned weeks of pay in a few minutes and expecting things to change.
Years ago I did win and get into a few thousand profit often which I would then throw away again, now I can’t even make a few hundred profit. I don’t know whether they have tweaked these slot games to make it even harder to win or what.

What I do know is that they certainly aren’t having any more of my hard earned. I was a fool to think I could win back my losses or that anything has changed, indeed they seem to have made it ever harder to win much. A change of bookmakers, six months abstinence and still the results are the same – the punter loses heavily and quickly. It really is a mug’s game

I have now excluded from BetBright and there seems to be no more left. I have checked my accounts with many other bookmakers. I am excluded from William Hill for two more years, Bet 365 for life, etc etc.
Day one again. But am determined to quit forever. Lost around £1000 this year in just four days of gambling in January and August.

I also feel bad that I have let others down as well as myself as it seemed I was setting an example here. I am now going to throw myself into my new anti gambling book which is still about half completed and make it as good as I can.

Never, never, never again – let ‘em starve!

Jane
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Nik, you are doing what the industry has conditioned you to do. Don’t blame yourself. These habits will take a long time to break. We keep going back for a kicking don’t we? But it doesn’t have to continue.
You haven’t let anyone down, you are still trying to give up gambling, aren’t you? Then, you are still a shining example to everyone.
Don’t beat yourself up and don’t make it any worse for yourself. What’s done is done. I originally only lost a grand and that was my biggest loss early on. But because I could never win that exact amount back, (I came close to getting it all back, but lost it many times just because it fell a few quid short of the mark.) So I chased for the next 7 years and I am now over 40 grand down and for what?
I could have made that thousand back in a few weeks, by genuine hard work, if I had just have accepted it, but now it has turned into a few years.
In the words of Frozen, (which I hate by the way!) Do yourself a favour and ‘let it go, let it go…..’

xx

NIK
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Thanks Jane,

I really am going to stop this time. I have said it before, but if I can do over 6 month, the longest I have gone, I can do a year, two years. I now need to aim for next March to beat my record.

However there are increasingly fewer sites I can turn to anyway, as I am self excluded from every major one. I have checked Betway, Betfair, Bet Fred, Sky Bet, Paddy Power, Ladbrokes, Coral, W Hill, Bet 365, Victor Chandler, Boylesports and many others and am excluded from them all – in the case of Bet 365, my favourite, for life.

I think what set it off was that over the next 3/4 weeks I am facing a few weeks without any income for the first time this year as my clients have dried up for the summer. I still have another payment for the exam marking to come and several clients already booked in for September plus others to return not counting any new ones. I also had enough money saved up to last me not just the next 3/4 weeks but 3/4 months, so I don’t know why I turned to stupid gambling to try to supplement my income – all that has happened because of that is that I now have a 3/4 weeks less money last.
It’s amazing that you can lose thousands of times more quickly on the slots than it takes you to earn it.

However I am strong now. No internet sites left and I can easily avoid the shops as I have done since before the internet.

Let ‘em starve!

Jane
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It doesn’t take much to sway us when it comes to gambling. It’s all about the mentality and it is stacked in favour of the industry. It sells itself on winning and casts aside the losers like they don’t even exist. Because of this, it’s up to us to remember the lessons we have learnt and use these as a weapon against the industry. Without our resolve, we are lambs to the slaughter because anything and everything can trigger urges and send us back to gambling.
If gambling were advertised fairly, then no one would be buying into it, but it’s not, so just keep in mind all those kicking’s you got and don’t go back for more!

Football season is about the football, not the bets, (believe it or not!) so enjoy it for what it is. One day, I hope to get through an entire 90 minutes without a gambling ad, but until that day, I scoff at the ads because I know that what they advertise is not how it pans out 90% of the time. I am forever saying ‘whatever’ and ‘yeah right’ to myself when the ads are on! It helps keep the urges at bay because it’s absolutely ridiculous, all those people betting and miraculously winning in all the ads….high-fiving one another and cashing out all the time…..drives you crazy if you let it! It shouldn’t be allowed because it is not a fair representation of what really happens and there is a rule that states that an advert must fairly represent the item being sold in such a way that truly represents the buyer’s experience, and therefore should show wins AND losses.

Take a look at this and laugh:

All marketing and advertising must be:

an accurate description of the product or service
legal
decent
truthful
honest
socially responsible (not encouraging illegal, unsafe or anti-social behaviour)

I think that’s a fail, then.

All the best, Nik. x

mat
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Today is Day 1 for me, yesterday I still had some remaining cash from the earlier winnings on me and guess what at one point I could have been £600 up, didn’t collect and lost the lot. I won over £3000 lost all of it.
I just cant be having money on me once I start and it doesn’t go my way everything will be lost.

Nik sorry to see you relapse, you made a post saying you haven’t gambled then lost money the same day I have been there, it always seem to go opposite to what you are saying, hope you give up gambling this time.

Loser you are in a place where I was 2 weeks ago, 3 months ago and 6 months ago, I won a total of £9000 how much did I keep ZERO I lost the lot each time shortly after winning it all within days or a week.
Once you win its all just a gambling credit/tokens – these wins are nothing, not enough to change life and walk away from gambling they will only keep you in the game and fool you into losing more.

I see we are all struggling, its hard, depressing and my self esteem is really low I failed so many times what upsets me this been going on for the past 9 years

Jane
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It’s been all I know now, for the past 7 years, Mat. It has to stop. My life is going nowhere, fast. I am 41 this year and that makes me feel really miserable. I hate losing all that time. Time is worth so much more than stupid money. Millionaires are going to die just like the rest of us. They go in the ground like any one of us, and they can’t add any more to the clock or turn it back. Life should be spent well, and progress should not be measured by what’s in the bank.

I might only look in my 30’s, but that’s hardly the point. 7 years have been lost. I was 31 when I first started gambling, but kept it really small for a few years. Then I started betting big and spending hours online. I can honestly say that I CANNOT recall much of my 30’s at all but I can name you every online game going and draw you out an entire roulette table in seconds. How sad is that?
Now, my 40’s are plagued with debt and misery and I’m still thinking about gambling. I’m still drawn to it, despite all the harm. It’s like one of those horrible, abusive relationships, where you stay with the person who is hurting you, believing that you can’t do any better or go it alone.
Will it ever end?
Hope so. When I was on holiday, a sign outside the casino read, ‘free tea or coffee for our casino customers’….that made me chuckle. They may as well say, ‘come in, lose your wages, but never mind, you’ll get a free cup of coffee to cry into’…..
Think they might need to offer something a little stronger to numb the pain!

loser
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Jane this is my last post tonight as I am tired. I didn’t want to post my win to encourage anyone to gamble and I hope that’s not the result. Normally I would never post wins but it was such a large amount I was too excited and besides being 1 year on here all you heard were my losses but you really struck a cord with me when you said, “You really haven’t won as your still down”. And your right Jane it could have gone another way and I could have been saying I am now in over $10,000 losses this year. I also know winning this could be very dangerous as it might make my urges full blown but you know what? I have been going so much lately anyway what’s the difference? Now Jane don’t get caught up in the illusion of my win you have too much to lose, your on Day 39 I was only on Day 6. This rarely happens Jane so wakey wakey stay on track and show us all that you can do this!!!! I am more determined than ever to STOP now. I am going to do this because I know if I go back I will LOSE!
It’s all bullshit Jane the machines are rigged bad I simply got on the right one at the right time and probably 1 to 1 million chance to win a jackpot.

STEER CLEAR OF GAMBLING JANE, YOU GOING TO ALLOW MY POST OF A WIN TO DESTROY ALL YOUR GOOD WORK? YOUR SMARTER THAN THAT!!!!

Goodnight

Jane
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Don’t worry, Loser, I am not going down that road again. My last experiences were wins, but I still hold strong, because I know like you, that it’s not always like that and that we just got lucky. Shame that we never take money off the casino though, it’s always some poor soul that’s lost their wages.
Still, what goes around comes around, and we have been on the losing side plenty of times too, so enjoy your win and get back on track.
Sweet dreams……

loser
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Joanne don’t play lotto that’s what got you gambling again in the first place, if you want something to scratch then scratch my back it’s itchy lol
I will call you Minnie mouse this week since all you have to eat is cheese!
Looks like I am behind you again in days but I don’t mind I like the view…….

hahahahah

Joanne
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I’m surviving! Good of you to abandon me with just a bag of mouldy old cheese while you went off and celebrated with your friends.

They say you find out who your true friends are when your down and out.

Maybe you’ll remember your old mate Joanne the one ….

who always congratulated you when you were achieving!

the one who offered you meals when your wallet was empty a couple of weeks ago!

the one who set up a petition to get you back on Rethink!

the one who was always there to pick up when you were down!

Anyway I’m not bitter, congratulations on hitting the jackpot!

Don’t you dare go near on-line gambling, it will probably cost you around 20 grand per year!

If you go anywhere near it , I’ll take up kick-boxing, hunt you down and kick the hell out of you!

I’ll probably be banned soon , so all the very best to you. Joanne

Jane
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FFS Loser. You are going to find it hard to give up now! I am pleased for you but be very careful, as that is seriously going to warp your way of thinking. I’ve only just put my post up to you to say that you have discouraged me from gambling! Lol. Now you are gambling and winning……Aagggh. This is so hard, isn’t it. But the reality is that you are still at a loss though, so we have to let you off with your ‘win’. It’s only some money back for you, the same as me getting a win last time, and getting my money back from the gambling companies. It does make you feel positive about gambling, when your luck changes, but we have to remember as you say, that it isn’t always like this, in fact, hardly ever. So the most sensible thing to do is to know that you got extremely lucky and hold on to it.

I know that you just got lucky but remember that luck is relative. It depends on how you look at it. Have you just got lucky or is this the worst thing that could have happened to you? Hope not.
Take good care of yourself now. I can’t blame you for being excited, who could? I know that you have had it hard and lost a lot over the years. Just don’t let this change of luck affect you badly. I know we all have very different gambling experiences and it doesn’t in any way, mean we are going to get lucky, either.

Can’t say that my heart isn’t beating a little faster than normal, though……
xx

LOSER
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Hi NIK,
I was very surprised to read about your relapse and even more so found it interesting that you relapsed around the 6 month mark, same as Jane and same as myself many years ago. When I relapsed years ago at the 6 or 7 month mark I felt no attachment to the machine and wasn’s enjoying it as much as before however after 45 min I was addicted again. Don’t look at this as a failure….It’s only a failure if you continue to go… Keep counting your days as 6 months with 1 relapse, don’t start from Day 1 again.

All the best mate!

Jane
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Loser, thank God I read your post! You saved me! You are absolutely right. I am strong. I was doing so well, full of determination and positivity and then I relapsed and I haven’t felt the same since. Trouble is Loser, the last couple of relapses were wins! Aaggh! Not easy to let go after that. Plus, I had income from gambling companies when they gave me back £1,235 of my money because I shouldn’t have been allowed to bet, being self excluded.
I think, the message from gambling lately for me, has been a little too positive and it has affected my way of thinking. I took £800 from Boylesports too, and I self excluded but not for long. I’m going to be a hundred per cent honest….I timed my self exclusion to end when I got back from holiday because I knew that I would want to bet.
You are going to be proud of me, because I have just been on Boylesports and self excluded for 5 years, the most they will give me. I feel a sense of relief.

The reason I keep available credit on my cards is because I am, and have been at the top of my overdraft for years, and if I get unexpected bills like when the car needed repair and failed the MOT, then I have somewhere to charge it to. Without it, I would be stuck and I WILL NOT go to family for a loan, because they made me feel like sh*t last time. I’m upset now, because I remember how bad they made me feel. I had just had a hefty loss, £2,700 gambling for 9 hours straight. All the debits were due to come out the bank, and Paypal were going to take all the payments for the bets in two days time. I only had half that amount in the bank, and was in a real mess. I kept gambling because I needed to get it back. I had spent far more than I already had and was scared sh*tless, so I was motivated to keep going for the win, but it just was’t happening.

I turned to them for help, with some lie about the bank requesting I repay my overdraft back in full because I know banks can do that if they want to. They said no, really coldly, and knew I was in a mess but pretty much abandoned me. I was charged £8 every day for 3 weeks because I was in an unplanned overdraft and I had calls from the bank and everything. My paypal account was suspended too. It was horrific. I was so scared my partner would find out. It is a bloody joint account for God’s sake. What was I thinking. We both received letters from the bank, and I had to make sure I got to the post first to hide them. I couldn’t sleep and made up some lie about being ill because I didn’t want food either.
I sold all my stuff and just said that I didn’t like them anymore. I had to buy stuff on credit from catalogues and sell them on ebay to put money back in paypal to clear the debt. It was really awful.

You may say it’s not their place to bail me out, and it isn’t, but the worst thing is, they knew I was in a mess and left me, but my wonderful ‘can’t do nothing wrong’ sister, came round (while I was there, I might add) and borrowed 2 grand for a new car that they didn’t even need. He handed it over willingly and it had obviously been discussed because it was already in a pretty envelope, waiting for her.

This made me really bitter because this is just another example of how we, as siblings are treated differently. I can completely understand where Kate comes from, (Hi, Kate, hang in there), and I truly believe that parents can be very biased towards their children and this is incredibly hurtful. I think, sometimes, they don’t even realise they are doing it but it wears you down over time.

My mum and dad NEVER say one dammed nice thing to me. My sister could sit down and sh*t on their front lawn and they would praise her for it! Everything she does wrong is excused. She has made up lies, got the police involved for false accusations, broke the family apart, kept us from seeing the kids, all sorts, and 90% of it has been her doing, but my mum and dad always say that she is influenced by her partner or that it’s not her fault because she is under pressure. It is her that is manipulative not her partner. She is the one in charge of all these devious plans but they just can’t see it. She has owned up to me about lots of stuff, lying to her own partner, many times, about their neighbours, to stir up trouble when she and him had a fall out. She told him that she heard them talking about him to deliberately cause trouble. She once phoned the police about my grandad’s dog because he wouldn’t give her any money and said that it was a dangerous animal. She is not a nice person at all. That dog was all he had.

Anyway, enough venting. I just wanted to thank you for motivating me. I have got my calendar back up. I did take it down because I had a glimmer for gambling again. I AM going to to do this, Loser and so are you.
Hey and guess what, it’s the 6th again!! If I had of gambled, I would have relapsed again on the 6th. It’s like Final Destination. The 6th is out to get me!

So now, thanks to you, I am going to start aiming for my 100 days again.
Today Day 39.

xx

loser
Reply

TYPO This was meant to say CASH

There are machines with a special light on them (green/blue light) which mean you can win anything and get paid by cheque (I meant cash)

LOSER but not tonight lol
Reply

Hi Everyone,

So I was on Day 6 today and I never thought I would go gamble on a Sunday, I never do as I am too busy and lot’s of good Tv show’s on at night. Anyway by 3:30pm I am bored and without even trying to fight the small urge I had I decided to go to the casino. Now it’s hard for me to lock my money up as the small jobs I do, I get paid cash on weekends. Now not blaming anyone but when I hear people relapse I think I too want to go gamble, anyway I had $500 cash on me and $330 in the bank. As much as I didn’t want to go it was like something possessed me and took over and made me go. (The addiction I guess) Anyway I thought god if I lose this I will be nearly down $10,000 this year which I never wanted to go over that amount however the past few weeks of gambling excessively has taken me right up to $9005 loses this year so far.
So I am not sure if everyone knows but I self excluded myself from the casino many years ago and the rules are if they catch me on the floor I get a $3000 fine and any winnings are forfeited and they donate them to charity. But of course I easily walk in unrecognised. Also the rules are here if I win more than $2000 I have no choice but to be paid by cheque (If this was to ever happen to me I’m gone as I would need I.D to get the money and I cannot give them I.D because as soon as i do they will know who I am and I receive the fine and lose the money anyway. There are machines with a special light on them (green/blue light) which mean you can win anything and get paid by cheque. The only issue with these machines are anything up to and over $10,000 can be paid by cash but they require I.D after $10,000 win. I know the risks but what are the chances of winning so much and I tend to go for the blue/green light machines anyway. It’s funny actually because i sit there hoping not to get the jackpot while other’s want it hahahah

So they also have certain rooms and you need a card to get access just by flashing it from a distance is enough to get in, as I walked passed for a second the guy that checks the cards walked away and I quickly walked into this room. I played and lost $400 and I was so depressed as I got the feature on $5 bet 3 times on 3 different machines and didn’t even pay me $100. Then I had a $100 note on me and these don’t go into the machines so when I asked the guy where the cashier was he said you have to walk out of the room. Damn once I walked out I couldn’t get back in so amazing I found a card just between a machine had a look it said Mr Arnold hahahaha so I walked out flashed this card and got back in. Lost that $100 to and I was pissed off but used to the usual feeling. Went straight the the ATM and got out $330. Decided I didn’t like Mr Arnolds room lol it was unlucky so went in the usual place I go to. Went on this machine which has sucked a lot of money from me the past few weeks and lost another $50 all I was thinking was i will have to withdraw the $2000 I have in the bank tomorrow and come back and try and win some money. anyway kept playing and out of nowhere BANG won the jackpot $661.30 I couldn’t believe it as it was really low and it came up. I was so happy and I said to myself LEAVE LEAVE but of course i decided to play the money and try and win more. This lady saw me win and said WOW.
I went on another machine I rarely play I have no idea why it’s never brought me any luck before and all of a sudden I won $455.40 so I took it out trying to do the maths thinking I am up LEAVE LEAVE but no I didn’t leave and ket playing but i noticed the machine was going off so I ket going doing crazy bets like $10 then $6 $4 etc It ket winning and I won another $850 I am thinking LEAVE LEAVE but no I stayed addicted as ever and kept playing betting $10 spins more often. It was a 5 cent machine but in the high gambler’s area and lowest spin you can do is $2 anyway I kept looking at the jackpot it was at $899 and the next jackpot $5004 and the next one $23,000 I thought maybe I should get off looks like the jackpot of $5004 reset itself maybe someone won so this machine won’t pay out but it started to win so I stayed. I took it right down to $600 something telling myself LEAVE LEAVE then all of a sudden I get the jackpot and if 3 fall down you get the lowest jackpot if 4 fall down you get the $5004 and if 5 fall down you get $23,000. Anyway the lowest jackpot now hit the $900 mark as I had been playing it so much and BOOM 3 fell then another and i was in shock and when the lat went to fall inside I screamed NO NO cause if i win $23,000 I need I.D i will be busted and I won’t get the money and then BOOM the screen stared at me saying JACPOT WON $5004!!! I also got the feature when the jackpot got won and panicked as my jackpot disappeared until the feature was over. While the feature was going I called the guy over and said where is my jackpot he didn’t believe I won $5004 but it showed up when the feature finished. So overall with the money I took $830 I am up $6000 YIPPPEEEE
This now brings my losses for the year right down to $3006.45!

Now I wasn’t going to post this but I am so excited and for once it’s the first win I have had in a long time. I quickly ran to collect my money and can you believe it a small voice said PLAY PLAY I wanted to play as I had only been there about 2.5 hours and felt fresh but I decided to run out of there before I changed my mind and also I think knowing the casino are full of drug dealers and had they seen the win they might have mugged me lol
Then I started to wonder why did I win? I hope I don’t lose my money in the shares i invested anyway so I relapsed but for the first time have no regrets. As much as this is not good and might trigger further urges in one way I will use it as a second chance and to not blow it by going back.
Now please guy’s don’t go gamble thinking you can win too because I guarantee you it was a huge FLUKE even the casino guy said so and when I started to think how long ago I have won so much it probably was 10 years ago. It really was a huge fluke as how many times dd I bet $5 got the feature and paid me nothing!!
Anyway when I walked out the lady that said WOW couldn’t stop laughing in disbelief I laughed too and said unbelievable!!! She probably thought every machine i touched I win jackpots she probably thought I was like the luckiest person, wonder if she would still think that if I told her I have lost half a million over my lifetime?

I will now STOP and take it seriously to really try to stop.

Goodluck guys!

loser
Reply

Hi Joanne,

At least you found the cheese! I know how your feeling but at least you have some money to buy a few grocery’s. I think your should put the software on and just self exclude from every site that pop’s up. I am amazed your upset over $300 when you lost $3000 you dint seem as upset? It was one lousy day big deal just remember and count how many day’s you have stopped gambling. Also maybe when spare money comes in just put it towards a electricity bill or something as even if you haven’t received the bill you will be in credit and the money hasn’t gone to gambling.

Chat soon gotta go

LOSER
Reply

Hi Jane,

Some tough love coming on here now………….

Why on earth would you have available credit on your credit cards? Why haven’t you called the bank and reduced your credit limit as your paying them off?
I think you need to get your act together Jane, your in the same cycle pay off, less debt then BANG you go and gamble. Stop being used to being in debt it’s time you got out of it. Let your husband control your finances if he cannot then pay a company that change a small amount weekly to do it all for for you then. When you get urges tell your husband so he can keep a eye on you.

STOP GAMBLING JANE JUST STOP

You were going strong at 6 months and then DOOM and you haven’t got back on since! You always mention the children shouldn’t suffer for your gambling so you go on holidays but I think the children should suffer for your gambling and know why they won’t be going on a holiday and they too will learn gambling is a dead end and you in turn will be more motivated to stop.
Your lucky you still have a husband many partner’s leave when their spouse cannot control their gambling.

You are strong Jane…….You have a lot of determination in you to stop throwing your money away. Don’t you want to be put of debt? Don’t you want to move to a more peaceful area? Until you stop gambling your life won’t change. You even had a calendar once that told you when you will be out of debt…….
Are you still looking at that?

I hope I hear you haven’t relapsed Jane, just let’s do this get on with this and change your life forever!

LOSER
Reply

Hi Kate,
Interesting what you said, you mentioned your mother said nothing hurtful yet you still perceived it this way? You also mentioned that the family hate one another well this tells me that generation after generation has learnt this is the way to communicate amongst one another. Maybe you have taken after your father’s side and have a natural different approach. At the end of the day this women is your mother and she LOVES you no matter what. Whatever she say’s to you deep down she loves you, she created you you have to remember that. Think about it……Your feuding with a 85 year old? Maybe change your approach, be softer and if she react’s harder just smile and leave but you must remember she is only passing on what she has learnt and obviously her mother was the same way she is to you.
Your doing so well giving up smoking and gambling keep it up!
Maybe replace the junk food for healthy food like sour dough bread, lamb etc and eat as much as you like and then when your ready cut down on amounts.

Don’t relapse you will feel like shit and then you will be behind me on days and that would be just weird lol

Kate
Reply

Thanks Loser – you are a dispenser of wisdom – thank you – you are right, I very much do take after my father and the problems between my mother and siblings have really exploded since he died. I took up gambling about 3 weeks after he died too. The root of the problem is that since he died , the family dynamic, which was more or less held together by his ability to calm my mother down and mediate between us, has shifted in a very destructive way. One good thing to come out of the shift though is that I now have an honest and building relationship with my older brother . He and I both know what we are dealing with , but I think we both feel a heavy sadness that our relationship with our mum is so difficult. Sadly, much as I want to believe you when you say that mothers always love their children, I think their capacity to love is conditioned by their own experience and by their expectation of how their children should be- in my mothers case she genuinely seems unable to show love to me . I have never been hugged by her in living memory, and she has never said she loves me. When I asked her whether she has ever loved me, she was silent and then said ” but I was very proud of you” . I try to put this to one side, dig deep and say to myself that, despite evidence to the contrary, she really does love me, in a simple, heartfelt way, but she certainly has a serious difficulty showing it. You would have to experience it to believe it, and over the years, friends have thought I was being harsh, until they see what she is like …she genuinely does not seem to be able to love me. This is not the case with my younger brother …… she does tell him she loves him, they walk hand in hand together, he sends her lots of selfies, they confide in each other, when my brother, his wife and my mother go for a walk, mum and brother walk hand in hand in front, and wife walks behind. I feel another trip to my therapist coming on …….!!! Thanks again Loser

loser
Reply

Hi Kate,
It is very odd that your brother walks hand in hand with his mother and his wife walking behind him. I wonder how the wife feels? It isn’t fair she show’s love to your brother and not you that would be very hurtful. How does your brother feel about this? Have you ever got your brother to speak to her? I wonder how your mother wouldn’t react if your brother told you he loved you as a sister?
If your mother has gotten worse lately maybe it’s because she lost her husband? Does your brother look like your mum’s side and you look like your father’s side? Sometimes mother’s prefer siblings that look like their own. it’s a sad situation, does she favour your brother’s children over your own? Whatever the case just take “she is proud of you” and so be it. Could be worse…..
Sometime’s you just have to let things go Kate, your got a husband and a great relationship with your daughter be happy with that. You cannot change how people feel or act towards you. I never came from a kiss / hug family, I cannot even remember if my parents have ever told me they loved me but deep down I felt loved because they showed it in many other ways.
This is your mother’s problem not your’s, you can allow it to destroy you emotionally and financially or you can learn to live with it.
Losing your father would have been very painful, maybe get counselling on how to deal with it? Remember wouldn’t your father be happy with your gambling? Think of that every tie you ave urges.

Kate
Reply

Thanks loser … yes rising above is the only way …. and I know my dad loved me and would not be proud of my gambling so that is a very good insight . Take care yourself xx

Kate Poole
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Serious attack of the gambling demons myself tonight – home alone – daughter back from her internship and she has gone with her stepdad to see the movie Dunkirk. I was feeling really low and said I didn’t fancy it – but I think this was an excuse to contemplate gambling. I haven’t done anything so far, and am hoping that by posting I won’t ….I’ve tried stuffing my face with chocolate which has helped damp me down a bit – so am also feeling weak, fat and pathetic after a few weeks of self-control! I don’t want to bore everyone, but my problem still relates to very mixed up feelings about my mother – 85 now and going strong. I’ve made big strides since last year limiting my contact with her, but I did see her a couple of weeks ago, and am dwelling on every word she said – none of it was obviously hurtful, but to me it felt like it was. I suppose deep down I still want to believe there is a chance we could change the dynamics of our relationship – but I know this isn’t possible.
My older brother, who I have a lot of respect for went to a family funeral on my mothers’ side last week – neither us had quite realized that family feuding runs very deep on her side – brothers hating brothers, sisters hating brothers, sons hating fathers – uncles and aunts not speaking, down the generations. It’s like a bad seed running through the gene pool – and also very warped views on what family relationships should look like passed down the generations. So to my mother, having an adversarial, competitive relationship with her daughter is ‘normal’. Thank the Lord I haven’t approached my relationship with my daughter in this way …… mothers shouldn’t feel in competition with their children, or think it is OK to withhold affection just to show who is in control. It sucks, and it has sucked, and I admit, still sucks after all these years.
Sorry for the moan – hope you don’t mind – but I am still very much struggling to cope with gambling ….. sort of waving, but almost drowning – need a bit of help

NIK
Reply

Well I have undone all the good work of the last 7 months and thrown £250 away this afternoon.

Found Bet Bright who I am not excluded from and tried to place a bet on the in play football, but because the odds kept changing as goals were scored I couldn’t get a bet on so I went for the slots.

Started losing on Cleopatra but then won £90 to take me into £18 profit. I should have quit then, but went on Cleopatra Plus. Was losing and well into debit before I got 3 of a kind to take me back into small profit. I was going to quit again but had one more spin whish immediately landed a bonus. I made £160 to take me up to £399 a profit of over £100. Then went on Rainbow Riches and once again fairly quickly taking me to £427.
Still couldn’t leave it and went on 500 Shields. Within 20 minutes it was all gone.

I will take a positive from this as it shows me that nothing changes – they suck you in with a few wins. As I was winning on the Cleopatra Plus bonus I thought I will take this, but of course nothing changes and I had to carry on.
I will not gamble again as this has taught me that even after 7 months nothing changes and it remains a total mug’s game.

Let ‘em starve!

Jane
Reply

That sucks, Nik. Just got back from holiday and feel dreadful. I am probably going to plummet like a base jumper without a shoot over the next few days.
Opened the mail and they’re all bills. I certainly know how you must be feeling. It is so hard to resist the temptation to gamble isn’t it, especially when you are short for cash and even when you’re not. It makes sense to be more sensible the less you have, but it seems for us, it’s the exact opposite that happens. The more strapped for cash we are, the more we are willing to risk.
Although you are obviously disappointed, bear in mind that you have not thrown away anything except just this one day. All those other days still stand to you. You’ve been inspirational on this forum and have been quietly stacking up your days and getting on with your life. I have envied your progress and determination! You have nothing to feel bad about so long as you can just let it go and move on.

I must admit that I put the Super 6 on for the football. It’s a free bet, but a bet nonetheless. I have also started doing the Pick 7 horses again on Sky Bet, but again, they are all free to play. It is more of a game than a bet, but it gives me something to look forward to I suppose. There is so much focus on betting and when you love sports as I do, then gambling is always being piped into our eyes and shoved down our necks.

I will probably be hanging on by a thread over the next few days. I have little access to cash but I have plenty of available credit on my cards that I will need to be careful with, as I have worked really hard to get the balances down on them.

The trouble with me is, I often win when I play and some of my biggest losses have come after I would have been up several hundred, if only I knew when to stop. Even if I am sensible and come off the game, even withdraw it, I will still go on to play another day and lose it again.

Then I get to thinking that if I just know when to stop this time and keep the win…….I can’t tell you how many times I have thought about going all out, one last time….and then walk away for good. One last big risk…..It always bothers me when I win and I have been sensible and not bet a lot, because then I wonder how much I could have won if I had just been more ‘brave’. I’m not greedy, I don’t want money as such, I just want to be free from debt. Who wouldn’t want that?

It’s all what if’s, isn’t it?…..tormenting ourselves with endless possibilities…..Better to just live in the moment and try to be content with just getting by. But it’s easier said than done.
x

Joanne
Reply

Sorry you were seduced by Cleopatra and her alluring eyes NIK! Cleopatra is probably in my top 3 favourite games. Gave up on Rainbow Riches, always picked the wrong well and it used to frustrate the hell out of me!

Bet-bright was the site I ‘forever’ self-excluded from a couple of days ago so maybe something to think about. I won’t be able to open an account with them ever again. It feels great to be free from another site!

Anyway, just get back on track and think of all that money you probably saved during those 7 months you were gamble-free. Was over on Gamcare the other day, a guy had relapsed after being 9 years gamble-free!

Kate and Jane , if you’re feeling tempted, best put some barriers in place, don’t undo your great progress.

All the best everyone.

p.s. I’m feeling rich, bought a £1 Lotto ticket with my loose change yesterday and won £10! lol

Andrei
Reply

Day 37 gamble free. Had few urges last night cuz Footie season started but at the end didn’t do anything stupid. Good luck everyone have a nice weekend

Joanne
Reply

Sitting here at my kitchen table doing nothing! House cleaned and now I’m sitting here thinking what a k**b I am for throwing away that 300 pounds last Monday. Could be out and about enjoying that money!

I haven’t installed a gambling block yet Loser, every review I read about it says, it can be uninstalled within half an hour! Plus, people have complained it messes with their computer and I’m not very ‘techie’. Anyway a bit skint until payday next Friday and I thought it best to pay the house insurance direct debit instead. So off into town now to do some food shopping. Baked potatoes are definitely on the menu , luckily I found a large unopened bag of grated cheese in the fridge ! lol I bet I find myself in the biscuit aisle. Why in the hell do we put ourselves through all this unnecessary hardship.

Keep posting Jane, you’re not bothering anyone , post as often as you like , I like reading your posts. I enjoyed reading about your holiday.

Nice to hear from you Nik.

All the best everyone.

Day 5 for me!

NIK
Reply

The English Lit marking has finally finished one month after the original deadline and I have managed to complete 570, 270 more than my initial allocation. Have already been paid for over 500 of them so just a couple more payments to come.
Apart from this I haven’t got any other worked lined up until well into September now and must admit I was tempted to gamble to try and supplement my income, especially as the football season has started. Thought about just having a limited, ‘controlled’ bet of a few quid every Saturday. Unfortunately I know win or lose it wouldn’t stay at that. If I lose I would chase losses and if I win I would use it to try to win more.
I still haven’t gambled since January 16th and I don’t want to throw away all the progress I have made. I easily have enough money now to see me through the next few weeks without earning any more, so I don’t really need to gamble.

Instead I am determined to throw myself into my new gambling book which I have neglected for the past two months. The horror stories in there will certainly knock any thoughts of gambling out me.

Remember the motto – keep your money – let ‘em starve!

loser
Reply

Hi Joanne,
Did you put the software on? I think that’s the only thing that might do the trick or even get rid of all cards and have a bank account but don’t have online access to it shouldn’t that work? I have never been tempted by online gambling as I feel it’s rigged and I rather do the real deal. I did occasionally have a casino thing pop up and t made my heart beat faster then asked if I was over 18 blah blah but then I stopped and got rid of it knowing the danger’s and damage the real casino has done. It’s day 5 for us and I feel safe as I am working a few jobs but next week will be interesting since it’s all rain rain forecast and I will be BORED! But going to make a real attempt this time.

Jane your never bothering anyone by posting, infact they are getting slightly better for me hahahah I even managed to read your whole post today!!! Sounds so nice where you grew up, definitely my kind of place but being on my own the isolation I wouldn’t like knowing if I needed help no one is around but as a family sounds fantastic and definitely peaceful and calm. There are a lot of people out there that read our posts, enjoy them and do not interact I CANNOT STAND IT! What can you do? In fact Jane if you stop posting I guarantee you someone new will post lol but then again they disappear as soon as you make a appearance.

Anyhow I want to know hoe my buddies Duncan and Mr X Gambler are going? And John where have you disappeared to?
Now Mat I really find it hard to believe that you are alway’s gambling with “winnings” eventually everyone lose’s their own money. No wonder your so addicted if that’s the case I wouldn’t stop either if I was gambling casino money.

Jane
Reply

Joanne, your home sounds lovely. There is something magical about the water. I have always felt drawn to it. I grew up in a beautiful part of Ireland. I loved it, as a child, running around with the sheep and cows. I would spend my entire day out, from morning till late evening, biking up and down the country lanes, and playing down by the creek. Me and my sister wouldn’t be seen till it was time to come in. We toured the entire coast of Ireland as kids, from Dublin to Galway. We would spend the night on a different beach each day, literally sleeping out in the car on the beach and go to sleep listening to the Atlantic roll in. It was so much fun. It was such a lovely childhood and I would love to do the same with my kids when I have the money.

There were mountains on one side and nothing but fields on the other where I lived, with the odd house, dotted here and there. My mum is English, and my dad is Irish so we are always hopping back and forth and probably should have shares in Irish Ferries!
I have probably spent a third of my life in Ireland, and came back here to settle and look for work. Then I met my partner and settled down with a family.
I really miss the freedom, and I miss the dark skies more than anything. I love stargazing, so the street lights are a real killer where I live.
Right now, I’m sat by the fishing lake and my kids are chasing the geese. It’s so peaceful. I can see lots of people all around, enjoying themselves, but it is still so serene and quiet.
When I go home, all I will hear is noise and aggro. The neighbours will be falling out, and drilling and banging, and it just never ends. There is nothing but concrete and I feel caged.
We moved around an awful lot as kids, (this is my 21st house!) and although it was fun, it was hard to keep changing schools and making friends. I wouldn’t want to put my kids through too much disruption, so when they are done with school, we hope to move somewhere a little more ‘me’.

Thank you for taking the time to talk with me, Joanne. It is very quiet lately and sometimes, I feel I am just annoying everyone, but I get down and it helps to type it out. It is better than gambling my soul away.
Stay well. x

Jane
Reply

Woke up with urges this morning. I expected it. It’s the last day of our holiday, going back in the morning. I’ve got to pay a lot of bills as usual plus the holiday bills will be rolling it too. I paid for the actual trip with cash from my wages, but most of what we did, ate, etc…has had to go on our credit card because there is really no other way. It’s either that or sit on my hands for the next 2 years and that’s not fair to anyone, especially the kids.
Fortunately, it’s low interest and I hope to pay a chunk off very soon.

Still, it creates urges to gamble because, of course, I want a fresh start and that fresh start isn’t coming any time soon. I guess that’s why it’s hard for me to let go of gambling because gambling leaves me with a feeling of hope, that I will be out of debt sooner rather than later, but that of course is a stupid theory based on what we already know!

I suppose it’s hard for me to be happy with what I’ve got because, well, financially, I haven’t got anything at all, so it’s not like I can even be rewarded for not gambling by seeing money build up in the bank. Instead, when I don’t gamble, all I see is the payments I make, being slashed by more than half because of blatant theft in interest. I paid Aqua (scum!) £58, 10 days ago. £46 of that has gone back on in interest. I could cry, I really could. I feel so trapped with it all. But I will keep going.

I hope I don’t wreck everything when I get home, because I always get really down after the holiday has been and gone because it gives me a focus, something to work towards. I was browsing on ebay yesterday and an ad came up for a new online site that of course I am not excluded from and I got such a glimmer in my eye, it was ridiculous. I said to myself that I will have to remember that one for when I get back. It’s like there’s no end to this, sometimes. I’m so sensible and at the same time, I’m such a d**khead!
Well, that’s all for today. Hope everyone is doing well. Glorious sunshine for us, so I plan to make the most of it. Had a lovely day yesterday, the sun was sparkling on the water and I sat on the boat, watching the birds dive for fish. Some seals came up and played by the side of the boat too. So peaceful. It seems the more I do on holiday, the more I resent what I am going back to. This is the life I used to have before gambling, being able to do things, go out, enjoy life a little. Now, I can still do them, but I know full well that every penny I spend is going to keep this debt round my neck even longer, so it takes the enjoyment away a little. My partner is the sensible one, he will always say, ‘do you think we really should be doing that, because money could go to better use.’ I know he is right, but I NEED life to carry on somewhat, or I will go stir crazy!

Still, it’s the bed I made for myself. I need to remember that every time I get urges so that I don’t have to lie in this sh*t any longer than I already do!

All the best.

Joanne
Reply

Hi Jane,

Just been reading your post. I was just thinking about you yesterday and how you would feel after your family holiday. I can see from your posts you really are an ‘outdoor girl’ at heart! I must be hard for you to pack up today. I live about 3 minutes walk away from a harbour. I never tire of seeing a boat come into the harbour, there’s just something magical about it. My father had a small boat but he’s getting on and after a period of serious ill health last winter he decided to call it a day and sold the boat. I used to like going out in it on a Sunday. However, I guess I like what the city has to offer when I get the chance of a few days away. The nearest Macdonalds , KFC etc is a 2 hour drive away!

There’s always an anti-climax after a holiday. Stay strong, don’t be lured back to gambling. You’ve shown great strength these past few months, keep going. All the best, Joanne

p.s. I see what you mean about e-bay. I was only on there yesterday pricing something and I was absolutely shocked by the amount of gambling adverts. You just can’t escape it. It’s time the Government was cracking down on it.

LOSER
Reply

Hi Joanne,
Good to hear you finally “forever self excluded” I am assuming the forever takes place after the 6 month ban? Well there is part of your reason why you kept relapsing because you truly didn’t to want to stop. That’s a first step but there are many more you need to take, like joining groups, socialising etc but baby steps is fine.
I thought I read your on day 2? Did you gamble again because I am on Day 4?
Your right about the more you gamble the more you want to go, I went 3 times a week the past 2 weeks and OMG urges galore whereas normally I can go and wait
2 weeks before I go again. Anyway my lan is to keep busy and as much as I cannot be bothered going out and meeting a friend for a coffee I will force myself to do so to keep away from the casino!

Goodluck Babe

Joanne
Reply

Hi Loser,

Good to hear from you. No, I’m still on the same day as you. I haven’t been gambling. I’m inclined to count my gamble-free days at the end of the day and of course there’s the 9 hour time difference between us. Now, what better incentive could a girl have than being on the same day as you , especially when I have such a ‘crush’ on you! lol

Only joking, on a serious note, I’m glad I placed that ‘forever’ self-exclusion on my favourite site yesterday. Andy is right, you do feel good afterwards. Like you’ve lightened the load! One less site to worry about. However, like you said, baby steps, but at least it’s a start. You’re right of course, placing ‘self-exclusions’ isn’t going to be the answer to all our gambling issues but at least it feels like you’re doing something positive. Letting go, ‘bit by bit’.

I was becoming concerned for you when you mentioned you’ve been going to the casino 3 times per week. Try and give yourself ‘a kick up the backside’ and make the effort to meet your friend this week-end. It always pays to keep up friendships, keeps you ‘in the loop’. I’ve been thinking about the last 7 months and on the whole I’ve been quite happy. Like you, sometimes I can’t be bothered doing things but looking back I’m glad I made the effort to go on those trips away to the city etc. and I’ve bought some nice things. Previous years, all I did was gamble. I’m lucky to have you ‘nagging’ me to keep working towards getting a life out there in the ‘real world’. Going on breaks, joining clubs etc. Keep nagging me and I’ll keep nagging you! Well, we’re getting to the stage of being like ‘an old married couple’! hahahaha The only bad memories I have of this year so far have been the lows of losing large sums of money to gambling. I’m trying to hold onto those horrible feelings that always seem to hit you ‘first thing in the morning’! As you said in your last post, those hundreds , add up and it then it hits you , the reality of what we’re throwing away.

Anyway, quiet weekend for me. Let’s keep counting those gamble-free days. We can’t let gambling tighten its grip on us again. Keep in touch (okay I’m bl**dy nosey, always wondering what you’re up to! lol) . Chat soon, always love hearing from you. Joanne

Joanne
Reply

Sorry Loser, I forgot to answer your question. When you place a ‘forever’ or ‘permanent’ self-exclusion on your casino account they close your account within minutes of you asking. You are never allowed to re-open the account. If you attempt to do so their system picks up on it and they shut you down immediately. However, there are hundreds of on-line casinos and it’s a constant battle to avoid temptation. Every single day new casinos are popping up. You can register with a new casino within minutes and be playing. They pretty much offer the same slot/pokie games, roulette, card games etc. Never be tempted by on-line gambling. Stay well clear.

Joanne
Reply

Can’t seem to stay away from this place! lol

Tried to put a gambling block on my laptop but just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Although I have been busy putting in place some more ‘forever’ self-exclusions. However, I just can’t bring myself to put a ‘forever’ self-exclusion on my favourite casino site. I won’t be able to play on it until the 26th September so I am aiming to be gamble-free up until then. Here’s hoping ……………

2 days gamble-free …….. but then again I’ve no money to gamble with! lol I’ve got some savings tucked away but I’m determined not to touch that money. I suppose I should be grateful that despite this gambling addiction I still have some financial security. I haven’t dipped into my savings account this year so that is progress for me. Anyway, I think it’s time time to put the brakes on playing the slots/pokies for a month or so. The more you play the more you want to play! So time to ease up a little and start notching up some gamble-free days. I think that’s the best I can hope for.

All the best everyone.

Jane
Reply

I think you are going for the damage limitation approach, Joanne and that may well suit you. It can sometimes be helpful to cut down and regulate what you spend until you feel able to break away completely. Sometimes, it’s like the same thing with food. If we give up something completely, we seem to crave it. Perhaps, you can self regulate better than some of us. I can’t seem to. I go too stupid and chase. I can’t accept a loss, so I shouldn’t be playing at all.
Be careful though with your aim to be gamble free until your self exclusion expires. It is hard for the brain to accept that you are giving something up with the reward at the end, being the same thing that you gave up!
I have done this too. I would give up gambling for a month, but the motivation for being gamble free was then looking forward to betting again. It’s kind of a conflicting message for the brain and damaging in the long run, but if it helps you regulate your losses and your well being, then it is of course, better than nothing.

I’m going boating today and it is very windy! Life jackets at the ready, I think. It’s hard for me not to post because it’s kind of like therapy. Just talking it out, even if no one is listening helps me to stay on track if only for that day.
All the best, Joanne. If I’m not back….call the coastguard!
xx

Joanne
Reply

Thanks Jane for your response. It’s kind of you to take the time and trouble especially when you’re on your holidays. It makes sense to close the account. If there’s a list out there of names of people who have self-excluded from bookies and casinos I must be top of it! Goodness knows I’ve spent the last 6 months placing self-exclusions. You may all be rid of me soon, surely there’s nowhere left for me to gamble! Glad you’re having a good time, all the best, Joanne

Andy
Reply

Joanne, just exclude from that site, you know you will use it eventually, we all do, just please exclude from that casino too, don’t keep it

Joanne
Reply

Thanks Andy for your support. I’ve done it, talked to them via live chat and explained to them that I am a gambling addict. I put a ‘forever’ self-exclusion on my account. I put a 6 months self-exclusion on it on the 26th March when I lost around £1000 so what’s the point in going back on the 26th September and probably doing the same again.

I think the reason I didn’t want to let go off it completely is because it’s a combined bookie/casino. I do like the horse-racing. There’s not that many on-line bookies so I won’t be able to place a bet now because I’m self-excluded from every single one of them.

It’s just the casinos, every single day there’s new ones popping up. Surely to goodness I can’t find any more of them.

Thanks again, all the best to you.

Andy
Reply

Well done, I’ve been the same, only excluding myself from betfair for 6 months at a time, knowing secretly ill go back and gamble, like i *used* to do. Not any more, banned myself for life just the other day.
Feels good. Now to stay out of the bookies lol. Feels like its a never ending nightmare!
All the best

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