Comments

Duncan
Reply

Hi folks,

Hope everyone is well and gamble free.

The majority of people who either comment or visit this site know that they must become a non-gambler in order to get their lives back under control.  For years I knew that gambling was causing me great harm; however, I continued to succumb to the lure of gambling.  I used to beat myself up that I was unable to stop and couldn’t understand why I continued to gamble.  After reading numerous pieces about gambling addiction I now understand the reason that stopping is so difficult – it’s to do with the way our brain work.

While our rationale mind may tell us that gambling is causing us great harm and that we must stop, we continue to harbour an emotional desire to gamble.  Why? Because we have been conditioned to believe that gambling gives us pleasure.  I cannot emphasis enough that gambling gives us no genuine pleasure.  A genuine pleasure leaves us feeling happy; whereas a false pleasure (in this case gambling) leaves us feeling empty.  I used to believe that gambling gave me pleasure; however, on reflection, I can honestly say that I was never happy while gambling.  Happiness is a sure sign of genuine pleasure and I suspect that a large number of people who have fallen into the gambling trap do so in order to fill a void in their lives.  If we can get to the root of the void, then we can attempt to address the issue.  Loser has continuously advocated the use of councillor and I couldn’t agree more if we’re feeling unhappy or unable to pin-point the void that exists in our lives.  Rethink’s slogan is “let’s remove the STIGMA from gambling addiction” which I couldn’t agree more with; however, this slogan also applies to mental health.  When experiencing mental health issues it’s imperative to speak to someone or seek help.  More often than not gambling addiction is rooted in unhappiness/ depression/ anxiety etc. and becoming a non-gambler is a pro-active step to improving our mental health.

We need to clearly get it into our minds that becoming a non-gambler does not mean that we’re giving up anything.  We’re ridding ourselves of a mortal enemy, which has been making our lives miserable, damaging our wealth and health and threatening our very existence.

Here’s to another day gamble free.

kate
Reply

Well put Duncan – now that i am both gamble and smoke free I am starting to feel happier than I have in years ….. I thought I couldn’t live without either, but I realize they were both holding me back from living. I did get a lot of help from a therapist, but I think the big breakthrough for me has literally been to notice my environment – rather than ruminating and focusing all my attention inwards, I make a conscious effort to focus outwards – I look around me, I experience nature, or the traffic, or the sound of children, or the sound of the animals ( we live on a farm track surrounded by cows) . If I feel my attention turning in again, I draw it out and observe what is going on. I think this is my own version of mindfulness – consciously observing what is going on around….may not work for everyone, but it is working for me. I don’t expect I will be able to feel simple pleasure and happiness all the time, but it is good to be feeling that my mental health is improving the further I push addictive habits behind me. We think we need these crutches, but we really don’t ….we’re not disabled, we can walk without support …we just need to be brave enough to stand again with our two feet planted firmly on the ground and tell ourselves we have the strength to get our lives back – one step at a time.

Duncan
Reply

Well done Kate. I’m glad that you are feeling a lot happier.

I was particularly interested in your comment about looking outwards as opposed to inwards. I can really resonated with this as when i was a gambler i constantly felt anxious. Not just when i was gambling but in my day-to-day life. I constantly reflected on things I’d said and things that i did or didn’t do. I’ve realised that i used gambling as a mechanism to bury my head in the sand and not tackle life’s problems head on. As a non gambler i definitely am more aware of my surroundings and feel better equipped to deal with problems that are part and parcel of life.

Thanks for your post Kate and here’s to another day gamble free.

Jane
Reply

I just want to say thank you to everyone. I agree, Andy, it would be nice to all get along. I wish you strength to get through your rough patch. I sincerely hope you stay well, Andy. Special thanks to Loser for listening. I will respect your wishes to live in the same room but not communicate, as you put it. (much like my house when the football is on!) I feel better now that I have had the chance to explain. I have been carrying that baggage for a long time, and it is nice to finally put it down.

I don’t know who Tipsy and Steve are but I don’t think they visit the forum often enough to know our story. Steve, you think we don’t realise how deadly this addiction is? People here, know all too well, how bad gambling addiction can get. We have lost so much because of gambling and I’m not talking money.
My arms have scars because I cannot cope because this addiction has made me weak. I hate that I can’t stand on my own, deal with my problems and the stuff in my own head, without trying to block it out by gambling. I went months without self harming and I am saddened to have gone backwards after half a year of being gamble free. My head is everywhere after relapsing again. The only thing I have are these good people on here and if you want to have their support, then perhaps it would be nicer to just come and tell your story?

Tipsy, if you actually read our posts, you will see that we are not arguing. We are resolving our differences and drawing on the support of one another. It serves a better purpose than confrontation.
These people are not clogging up the feed. They are the feed. If we don’t post…..will you? I don’t recall you contributing before and since we are the people who post regularly, Duncan, Kate, Loser, Nik, Joanne, Mat, Andy, John, and Mr x Gambler, (well done for your days Mr x), ….and myself, then it would be pretty quiet around here without us. Although I understand that some people prefer to just read the forum, if we all just read, then we would soon run out of new things to read wouldn’t we?

It occurred to me that I relapsed on 6th May, and it was the 6th of November when I relapsed earlier,
6 months before! 666!
Anyway day 3 for me. I want to take a little break now, but the posts keep crossing and I just wanted to make sure you all know how much I appreciate just having you all there. It’s going to be a bit tough for a while and I need to get busy making some money. I have spoken to my boss about some extra hours and it might be possible, so fingers crossed, just need to juggle the kids care needs which can be tricky but I’ll figure something out.

That’s it now for a couple of weeks.

My X gambler
Reply

Week 10 tomorrow

Duncan
Reply

Excellent work my X gambler. Keep it going!

Loser
Reply

Well done Mr X gambler it appears your true to your name!!

Jane
Reply

Loser, I don’t want to offend you by responding, but I just want to say thank you for taking the time to talk with me. :) I have issues. No doubt about that. Yes, it is nice to be liked, but I was never looking for you to like me, just to move on from the past. I struggle with something called pain association and it means I hold onto heartache and bad memories instead of letting it go. I simply wanted to be able to read your posts without them reminding me of the bad events on the forum, the fall outs, the incident that overshadowed Christmas….etc. I want to move on. Sure, it’s nice to be liked, but I’m not here to make friends. So, it’s not important that you like me, just that you let me move on.

I interpret things as negative because I have had a lot of bad experience. It doesn’t mean that what you say about me is bad, just that I may take it wrong because I have a low opinion of myself. That’s my problem, no one else’s. I understand that you don’t want to chat because you are worried I may go off on one. I have this issue with my partner, and he always says that he must be very much in love with me to put up with me! So I know where you are coming from there. Plus he says I only look 30 when really I am 40 so I am worth the heartache, he says! Though if I keep this crap up, I’ll implode through stress one of these days.
I had lots of friends at school, and Joanne was right when she described me a few months back. She mentioned that she thought I was the sort of person that would light up a room, and she is right. That is how I like to be around people, I don’t like to bring people down with my problems, as it is easier to smile than to frown. Trouble is Loser, it’s not real. I am sad inside and that’s how I took to gambling.

Although I had friends, they felt forced, and we grew apart. I guess I grew up fast, and moved about a lot, this being one of many homes I have lived in through the years. Also, I may be gambling to excess, but I was never into drugs and sleeping around like they were, and I felt out of sorts in their company. I am a bit complicated, in that I am very studious and driven, but also very laid back and reckless! I am at home in the forest, up a mountain or on the beach. I don’t care for money, so why I gamble is a bit of a mystery to me. I like money only for the peace it can buy.
As for the loan, I did it online yes, and took it out as a joint loan in both mine and my partners name because I am not able to get approved on my own as I have a low credit score. It took very little effort to get, and was approved quickly. Sadly, it won’t be paid quickly. It was meant to pay off debt and it literally took 2 days to go into our account, right around the time of feeling at my lowest. It could not have come at a worse time. Stupid thing is, I knew it was going to happen. I felt it coming yet it seemed hopeless to stop it. It’s like being on a runaway train and you know you are heading for the end of the line, but you stay on the train anyway. I’m so mad with myself.
Sadly, I do know why I have issues, and although I don’t like to admit it, I know that is the root of many of my problems, at least the self harming. It is rather an unpleasant subject. Let’s just say that I had a couple of unfortunate things happen to me as a youngster and it left me bitter. I can talk to my partner about this and he knows the deal with all that. He is there for me, and I am grateful for that.
Well, of course, there is no need to respond. I don’t expect it. I am going now to put my pearls on…ha ha…I actually look like a blonde Lena Heady from Sarah Connor Chronicles and I kind of dress like that too. It’s funny how you think of others isn’t it! I kind of wish I was that sensible, straight laced person you had me pegged for. I’d be better off financially, that’s for sure. Thanks again, I will take your advice on board. Off to start racking up my days now. Will post when I have made some decent progress.

LOSER
Reply

Hi Jane,

I have decided to respond to your post one last time but only because I know what it feel’s like to relapse and also because I am quite upset you resorted to self harm. But please respect my decision as to why I prefer to not communicate with you and do not take it personal.
Firstly your comments…….

You said things like, ‘why did we let Jane beat us, to Joanne’, that I am ‘definitely not your type’, while Kate is a contender, but you don’t even know me, so it seems you are singling me out in a negative way.

I hesitated to type “why did we let Jane beat us,” because I had no intent on complimenting you, nor making myself look like a failure however it was so funny, I just would do anything for the laugh. Isn’t it interesting though that you saw this as a negative? Now as for the “Definitely not your type” I was clearly talking about the fact that our personality’s clash, it was funny, this is how I expect everyone to react when they read it. Yet once again you see my comments in a different light and once again, I repeat this is why I cannot and don’t want to communicate on here with you. Sure we get along however there would be many times that you will read and react to my posts which firstly will not be helpful to your recovery and secondly your negative reaction to my post isn’t helpful to my recovery. As for Kate being a contender, well Kate is sweet and her posts are short and sweet and relaxing so yes she would be a contender but once again it’s a joke! Your married, Kate is married we all will never meet, regardless of whom I prefer it dosn’t mean anything is wrong with you. Yes your very emotional and very sensitive and maybe my sense of humour isn’t good for your recovery so by living in the same room here but not communicating is best.
So you tell me you need help? Fat lot of help I am I keep relapsing LOL
However there is a few observation’s and from memory a few tips I could offer you……
Firstly from some time ago I recall you did not self exclude from all gambling sites I recall you felt strong enough that it wasn’t necessary. I also recall you being fine with the laptop in a room on your own. I was amazed you took such risks, urges come at any stage of our recovery and you must be on guard at all times. I suggest for the future that you are always monitored when on the laptop. Buy yourself some anti gambling software and install it on all computer’s at home. I still don’t know how you took a loan out? I assume you did that online? I do not know what the procedure is here however if you need some form of I.D like a driver’s license or passport number to do so then I suggest you give your husband all these items and do not record the number anywhere, maybe this will help with not borrowing money again. From what I know of you Jane I think there is a much deeper rooted issue here. Not all gambler’s self harm, clearly something run’s deep that troubles you so I think it best you see a counsellor like myself on a weekly basis to find out the real reason you fall into depression. I recall you saying you didn’t have many friends growing up, maybe this is a small part of it? Only you can unravel the real reason you self harm, I think this is a bigger problem than the gambling. Let it be known just because I don’t communicate with you doesn’t mean I do not like you. You just give me the shit’s sometime’s HAHAHAHAHA (thats a joke) Why is it important that a man called LOSER likes you or not? I am a hopeless gambler remember in life there are many who don’t like me, I simply shrug it off. Of course it’s nicer to be liked by everyone but hey who know’s there reason’s? I have had people dislike me for my success, for my morals and standards, for not drinking to excess like themselves blah blah blah If you love yourself enough it doesn’t matter who like’s you or who dosn’t.
I think you need to STOP antagonising yourself with the thrill of putting money in but deciding to pull it out. Are you hearing a voice telling you to do that? Are you seeking excitement? Why do you even do that to yourself? Are you scared to stop gambling? Are you scared of being successful of calling yourself a non gambler? If you want excitement get some fluffy handcuff’s and handcuff your hubby to the bed, trust me he will love it LOL
As for Joanne your right she is on her best behaviour, hahahaha I’m surprised myself lol However it appears to me Joanne want’s another chance and although she has blown many chances over and over hahaha it was nice to see Andy post to her because this is a sign of forgiveness.
So I was correct with your blonde hair but I really thought you would have had a set of pearls LOL (joke)
I hope you consider a counsellor I really think you need to concentrate on yourself, remember I said along time ago it’s great to be here for everyone but remember to help yourself? Find the deep rooted issue, work through it, learn way’s to not allow it to make you fall in a depression. No need to feel ashamed for relapsing we all have done it. Also Duncan gave you the best piece of advice that you only have gambled once in 6 months. The best thing you can do for yourself now is get back on track and believe in yourself. Tell you what if I reach 6 months gamble free I will chat to you on here again.

Come back when you are ready I will be on my best behaviour LOL

Jane
Reply

Hi everyone. Yes, Nik, you are right. I am posting again, because you are all my source of support and if I shut you all out, then I will only get worse. I am dramatic, yes, and I feel things deeply. My pride is hurt, but not because I relapsed and lost money, but because I feel I have failed my family. I was proud because I felt that I was making things right for them, and now I have set us back even further.

Andy, you are right, I should not blame others for my relapse, and I accept responsibility. The words do not always come across in my posts the way I mean them too. I type super fast and the words just come. What I really meant to say was that I was struggling, and I mean really struggling with my emotions. There was some personal problems at home and Loser is spot on, I lost my foundation of support and I crumbled.

I would turn to the forum to read posts for support, but instead of reading positive things, I would have to read quips about me from Loser as he seemed to like dropping my name to others in a not so complimentary way, still being playful but at the same time, making it known that he was not a fan. It’s fine not to like me, if that’s the case, and that he doesn’t wish to speak to me, but then why comment about me at all? I felt that it was an unnecessary bid to get a reaction from me. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn’t, but still, It hurt because I wanted to have closure on the past and just all get along.
I am over sensitive, and I know that, and me and Loser have had our problems in the past, but it seems that he was going out of his way, to remind me and everyone on the site, that he didn’t like me….’oh please don’t say, Jane, because she is definitely not my type’….’hello sexy eyes….no not you Jane’…and the like, yet he would not talk to me or answer my posts.
That is what I meant by the forum not helping me of late, just that I felt as though Loser would take opportunity to dis on me, rather than talk to me, despite me approaching him with kindness and support. That hurt, is all but I respect his choice not to communicate if he so wishes.
My relapse is my fault. I chose to do it and I have to live with it now. Thank you for your support, Andy.

Duncan, you are still my hero. Thank you for your kindness. Yes, you are right, relapse is part of recovery. It is not a failure. All of my 181 days without gambling still stand to me and have all helped me grow strong. I will take some time away for a while and come back when I feel strong enough to give advice again, because right now, I feel a bit of a hypocrite since I have just blown 3 grand and nearly 6 months of hard work. Still, it is so incredibly worth doing and I will make this happen. If I can do 181 days, I can do it again, right?

Mat, thank you for your support also. You have had a rough time of it too, and it is good to share our ups as well as our downs. There is no shame in this. It is just a shame, that’s all. It’s the guilt for the kids, that hurts the most, but I will make the sales work and get some of this money back. I can come back again, strong and make this work. Thanks, Mat and good wishes to you.

Kate, you are not talking to a void. I am lurking in the shadows. I said I was leaving because I feel such a failure, but I will get through this. I am sorry that I have let you down by not staying strong, but I can beat this, and you can too. The self harming reared it’s ugly head again, but I have support at home and my partner knows what I did to myself and what I lost gambling again, so I have forgiveness and acceptance of my mistakes, so I can move on. The most important thing to me, is that the kids are protected from my self harming. I want them to grow up strong and safe and know that they can do absolutely anything they put their mind to. I have never shown weakness in front of them….besides sobbing at movies! So I am proud of that, at least.
I’m not hiding it from anyone. It happened and it’s not pretty, but these things happen to all of us and at least I am in a much stronger position, mentally, than when I gambled last November. Funnily, it was 3 grand that I lost then too. I have come a long way and so have you, Kate and even though you have relapsed, from time to time, you remain strong and feel that your life has more focus now. You will beat this too, Kate. We all will. Perhaps, my relapse will help others to steer clear of gambling and to know that we still have to keep our guard up, no matter how long we go.

Thanks to all of you. Really appreciate it. Hope I can return the kindness to all of you, but of course I hope you don’t need it! Best of luck to you too Joanne and John and all of us.

Gonna give you all a break for a while now because I need to rebuild, and just like Arnold Schwarzeneggar, I’ll be back!

Tipsy9
Reply

Not being funny but all I see on here is JANE .. LOSER .. and the same names , this is meant to be for people to post there stories on how gambling has destroyed there life’s and all you lot do is clog up the feed with your stupid pathetic arguments- grow up & stop posting crap on here and leave room for other people !

steve
Reply

i agree! to be honest i don,t think they relize how deadly this addiction is!

LOSER
Reply

Hi Tipsy,
You posted quote….
“this is meant to be for people to post there stories on how gambling has destroyed there life’s and all you lot do is clog up the feed with your stupid pathetic arguments- grow up & stop posting crap on here and leave room for other people !
So what is your story Tipsy? Guess you simply clogged up the feed with this post too eh?

Andy
Reply

Well what’s your story then tipsy9??

Andy
Reply

Jane, everyone on here cares about you, I honestly don’t want you to stop posting, you give me great strength in your advice, as does loser, Kate Joanne etc etc. Why can’t we all just get along and beat this together? Please let’s try, really try. I need everyone’s support on here, going through a really bad patch at the moment. On day 13 at the moment so still going strong. Hope it lasts.
Peace ✌️

Duncan
Reply

Hi Jane,

I just want to take this opportunity to thank you for the advice and support that you have offered me during the last 6 months.  You were the first person to respond to my first post and have continued to support me. I really appreciate the time that you have given me.

Relapse is always a particularly difficult time to deal with; however, you have only gambled once during the past 182 days. This is still an incredible achievement and you should be proud of the progress that you have made.  You have continuously advised people that relapse is part of the journey the addict needs to make in order to free ourselves from gambling.  Your recent relapse is just part of your journey in becoming a non-gambler. Dust yourself down and come back stronger than ever.  I wish you all the best in overcoming your demons and hope that you can find happiness in your life.

Here’s to another day gamble free.

mat
Reply

Jane you relapsed, we all do, there is no guarantee a site or anything will help 100% to give up gambling, it must come from the inside. Relapse is not the end of the world, you can always try again, you should have put some restricions in place so that if relapse happens you only lose something but not everything.
You need to stop gambling and with time you will heal, think its only money and there are worse things like imprisonment, terminal illness,disability or war, money is only money period, one day you have it and the next you don’t. Remember you have a choice in this some people don’t so don’t feel losing some money is the end of the world it isn’t. Jane nobody wants you out, its all in your head, everything is and after a loss you get pessimistic understand.
I am sure you will find this site again, its easy, I never even subscribed just visit when I think about gambling or check how you people doing helps to see i am not alone in this.
I am not Asian so you were all wrong by the way people. I am doing ok but I get tested all the time, things make me upset all the time and nothing is easy day 11 it is. I visit the site ocassionaly, I try to keep myself busy and move forward even by a small bit you cant change the past.
I know some of you might not like me but I am only sharing my story and what happened to me I didn’t think some of you might interpret my wins as gambling triggers but trust me I lost way more and everytime I won it goes all back and sometimes with more of my own money so don’t gamble, gambling wins are like a curse, bad karma for sure, you win at the expense of others, you will never beat a bookmaker or a casino never.

john
Reply

Hi jane thanks.for your help i hope you came agian in this site and be gambling free agian

loser
Reply

Hi Andy,

Oh big berk means muscular? I thought it meant big gut lol If you have a good marriage with your wife then definitely tell her, write her a letter and make out like you have just started to have a problem with gambling and ask her to control all the money. Trust me with a good women by your side supporting you then it will be much easier to give up gambling!!
Goodluck mate

Andy
Reply

Thanks for the support and advice mate.

LOSER
Reply

To Jane,

I will not accept responsibility for your relapse or self harming. It appears that you want to control who post’s what and who is on the site. As much as I cannot control Mat’s bragging of win’s you cannot control if Joanne chooses to return. Rethink monitor’s all my posts so for them to allow my post online they felt there was no malicious intent towards anyone in my post. I was simply having fun and all I said about you was that I think you have a blonde bob, if you feel that’s childish and silly, then now you know why I choose not to communicate with you here. You were not pin pointed at all I had even called Joanne chubby and Andy had a chuckle of his perfect hair, so I ask why do you react differently? I am slightly psychic and wanted to know if my visual of everyone on here was correct.
I am not happy to hear you relapsed, because by you staying strong it showed me I could truly give up gambling too. I am surprised and impressed at your resilience of reaching 181 day’s however believe it or not I always knew if there was ever a family issue that you would unfortunately relapse. Your family is your rock, your support so if anything weakened that support that it would be difficult for you to stay on track.
At no given time did I choose to not read your posts to hurt you. I had already told you for me they were too long and while I found them interesting the first 10 lines I seemed to get side tracked in finishing them. You and I Jane do not communicate on the same level hence why I interpret your posts to have dig’s at me and you interpret mine to do the same. This is why I chose to avoid your posts, I don’t want to have to tip toe around you all the time being careful to select my words and thinking should I type this, should I type that. You need to understand that by not communicating with you here avoided many argument’s and you really didn’t have a issue with it until Joanne returned. I bypass Mat’s post’s and he couldn’t care a less I don’t know why it’s a issue for you.
You mentioned that the site and everyone has helped you to reach your 181 days, so I strongly suggest you stay here to receive the support that you deserve, after all you have really gone far and beyond helping everyone else here. Maybe it’s time to sit back and let everyone offer you support and encouragement to get back on track. Whilst I prefer to not communicate with you here I will promise you that I won’t ever mention your name to anyone in my posts ever again.

Wishing you good health and strength to fight this addiction.

Jane
Reply

Hi Loser, thank you for your reply. I appreciate it. I do not want you to accept responsibility for my relapse. This is nobody’s fault but my own. I want to curl up and die in a hole.
What hurts me is that I really wanted to help you and for you to help me. I don’t need tiptoeing around, I may be emotional but I am incredibly strong. I had to be to hide all this from my family for 6 years. I would lose a grand, come downstairs and turn on the smile, like nothing had happened. It killed me to do so, but my family are as you say, my rock. My partner is helping me to fix the losses. He has found some stuff to sell. I feel awful, but I know that it is the addiction. He feels bad because I told him about the depression and he thought I was ok. No one can save me when I get it in my head to gamble. I will go above and beyond to get my way and it seemed I knew it was coming too. I would never hurt them intentionally, and I will fix this, just like I did before. My pride is hurting very much right now, as is my heart, but I have to pick myself up again. It may just take a while.

You know that I have continued to support you, despite everything. Surely that says something about my character. I care about all of us. Not just those who agree with me all the time. You talked about wanting to take up bingo, and although I wouldn’t reply directly to you, since you asked me not to, I would always cater my posts to yours if I felt you needed support. I tried to help you set up your email notifications again, but it seems you are still struggling with that! And I asked you to stay when you said you were leaving because I knew you were hurting. The sad thing is you seem to interpret things badly, and I know I do too, but you can’t always say the right thing for everyone.

The fact that you ignored my pleas to move on, and just kept dropping my name in a more derogatory manner than anyone else’s, hurt me because I don’t want you to talk about me, I want you to talk to me.
You said things like, ‘why did we let Jane beat us, to Joanne’, that I am ‘definitely not your type’, while Kate is a contender, but you don’t even know me, so it seems you are singling me out in a negative way. Even Joanne says you seem to be obsessed with me which proves you seem to like to discuss me! You would quote my days and also interpret my posts as an attack on you, when that was never ever intended.

In the past, you and Joanne both told me off for posting often and posting long, then you both come on here and post a lot of talk about dating, with long posts about things not really relevant to gambling, which made me feel like it was not about the posts I put up, or the length, just that you didn’t like me?
The only reason things got worse lately, was that you communicated more with Joanne when she returned, and dropped my name a few times, but not in the same way that you discussed others. It seems to me like you talk about others affectionately, and playfully, whereas my name was always dropped in a negative sense? Joanne has not upset me at all since her return. I was actually happy to see her posting again because I knew it would help you and her to have each other’s support. I actually like having the two of you around, despite our differences. We are on a journey together. We are like the Expendables, an odd bunch of people thrown together, but all with the same goal in mind.
Truth is, Loser. I need the help. I struggle with my emotions, like any gambler does and I have let myself down badly this time. I have blown £3,000 in a bid to self sabotage. I am back at the point I was last year. That is crippling me, mentally as you can imagine. It was a loan to repay debt, but it’s all gone and now I still have to pay it back.

None of the talk about what we all look like bothered me at all. I know you both discussed everyone, it was the other kind of name dropping, and you know what I mean.

While I may not feel my best today…. allow me to summarise so you can adjust your psychic radar.

I have long wavy naturally, blonde hair, tan easily and blue eyes. I am 5 foot 6. I am slim but womanly as my partner puts it! I am athletic but love to eat. I have an IQ that many would love to hate. I am not a girly girl at all, never been in a salon or beauty parlour. I like military style clothes, flats (well done Joanne!) and dress like I have just come off the set of an apocalyptic zombie film. I am quite kick ass and strong mentally and physically, but I am as soft as anything inside. I cry easily and once cried for 18 hours straight after watching P.S I love you. (don’t ask….) I am musical, and sing and play guitar. I love nature and would love to travel. I believe in God but I also have a scientific mind. I believe you can have both God and Science in your life and both have served me very well. I am a mess, but I also know I am very lucky. I have very little, but I am grateful. I am a gambler and I am a mother.

Take care, Loser. Will return to the site when I feel ready, but it is not right now.

Jane
Reply

Hi, everyone. It is with a very heavy heart that I inform you all, that this will be my last post on the forum. Not like Joanne’s frequent ‘last posts’, but my actual last and final post. I have been suffering with soul destroying depression over the last few days and sadly begun self harming again due to a string of bad circumstance at home. It has been made worse by the nature of the posts on the site again, following the return of certain members. I know some of you may regard it as playful banter, but it’s different when the comments are aimed at you. I have asked for people to talk to me, not about me, but after shaking a virtual olive tree, not a branch, at Loser, it seems he would rather keep making silly and childish comments about me to others, than be a man, and talk to me directly and that is a real shame. Loser, you completely ignore all my posts and support, and instead just comment about me negatively, to others. This is not a game, it is real life and today, it hurts like hell.

I have absolutely no reason to be sorry for the past, since I did nothing wrong. If you recall, in the first instance, it was me and Loser that were falling out with Joanne, but because I stood up for Mat, Loser turned on me, because he felt that Mat was upsetting some of the people by posting about wins sometimes.
I was targeted on the site multiple times for reasons which are unclear to me. I was never going to stop posting support to Mat, because both of us knew that a win is never a win and I knew that he needed support and friendship like everyone else. So I became a target for abuse which as you all know ended badly with both of them being warned about their behavior. The only way it seems to get you to leave me alone, is to leave the site and I know that is what you have wanted, all along so now you have your wish.

Many of you will have noticed that I have offered kindness and continued to support every member on this site, including loser and Joanne, despite some of their attitudes towards me, but I am obviously beating my head against a wall here as it seems easier to play games with people’s lives, than to all just get along. I wanted nothing more than to have everyone happy and free from gambling, for us all to be friends, and I have tried so hard, to make this happen.

I am really sorry to say that I have relapsed badly and my financial future is uncertain. I feel positively sick and completely lost. I felt so low, I got a loan and blew the lot on gambling. I don’t know my own name right now. I just want to go to sleep. I am not blaming anyone, but I will say that the site has not helped me at all of late, and I feel a target for just being here.
As a family, there will be no caravan holiday this year, and I am up here now, photographing my items to sell again. I have been here many, many times before and I hoped it was behind me, but as we all know, it is here for life and that’s the sad truth about it.
I had a good run, and thank you to everyone who helped me. Best wishes to Kate, Nik, Mat, Duncan, Mr X. John…..I wish every one well, you too Loser and you too Joanne. All of you. I wish you all well, but I cannot visit the site anymore, so you will hear no more from me. Period. I have also unsubscribed so I will not be receiving any posts, as the site is no longer helpful to my recovery. Just like Carl, I believe the site has changed, it’s not what it used to be. Stay safe everyone and please all try and get along. Emotional stability is vital for a recovering gambler, as my relapse has just shown, so good wishes to all of you and remember there’s no point responding to this because I can’t read it, so if anyone has anything negative to say, you might as well just save your breath.

15,638,400 seconds
260,640 minutes
4344 hours
181 days
25 weeks and 6 days, gamble free
Now day 1.

Kate
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Dear Jane. I know I am probably typing into a void and you genuinely have left the forum, but I will really miss you. I do think you have a heart of gold and you have completely supported me and others in giving up and the early steps to being gamble-free. I am really sorry that you have lapsed again, and are self-harming. I’m sorry that this site has contributed to your lapsing. Take care Jane, start over and try to build a slightly thicker skin to protect yourself …..that’s what I learnt in therapy …..to grow a thicker skin so I am less easily hurt by other people. I will miss you. Take care xxx

Andy
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all the best

Andy
Reply

Although I don’t think it’s fair you blaming people on here for your relapse….I wish you well for the future

NIK
Reply

I don’t know if you will see this Jane, although I suspect you probably will.
Please don’t think I am getting at you, but in my vast experience of Internet forums (I started UK Punting which now has over 100,000 members), many people who announce they are not going to post again more often than not do. I know as I have done so myself. Consequently I no longer announce I am not going to post again on forums as I so often have done.
I am very sorry that after all this time and all your progress you have relapsed again. If anything this has made me more determined than ever to maintain my progress.
I know some on here might think you are a bit of a ‘drama queen’ but that is because you are really a sensitive and caring person.
Your advice and support on this forum has been very helpful to me and I am to sure many others.
Whatever you decide to do I hope things work out for you and I for one will miss you.
All the best Jane and please take care.

Joanne
Reply

Hi LOSER,

This is my last post until I come back, downgraded from i-phone to basic phone because of the on-line gambling! Hey, calling a girl ‘interesting’ you’re going to have to do better than that, lol I’ve got Andy on reserve now, although I’ll have to get higher heels! He’s very masterful , he knows how to keep me in my place!! lol

Ah well never a girl to avoid trouble , let’s see

Mr X Gambler – probably tall, dark and handsome

Jane, sensible , perhaps ‘office girl’ , raincoat , flat shoes, dark, although could be pleasant/pretty faced ,small , wide hipped, You’re a little obsessed with Jane , possible love/hate ?

Duncan – small/medium build, I’m seeing a grey feather-cut hairstyle, a fairly ‘cool’ likeable tutor

Kate – possibly strawberry/blonde in her youth, medium/big build, tousle hair, warm face

Me – queen of the black eye-liner!! green -eyed , pale skin, size 8 – small

Matt – Asian , possibly medium/large build, for some reason cropped hair

John – as you described Matt , Asian, small build

NIK – grey haired , medium build, school teacher type/ serious

Carl – handsome, possibly reddish blonde

You my sweetheart, medium/tall, possibly reddish blonde, perhaps receding hair-line (sorry) , pleasant/cheeky faced, , my number 1 guy!

I’m going to go now, keep busy, catch up with you when I get back. xx

LOSER
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Hi Joanne,

You think I have reddish blonde hair? HAHAHHAHAH
Here goes you ready……..
I am 5’7 tall
Medium build but overweight now I have a bit to lose.
Medium Brown hair which I have highlight’s in sometimes.
3 day stubble look
My hair is styled like hmmmmm WILD bit like John Travolta in Grease, sideburns and all.
Was called “cute” in school (I couldn’t stand it) I wanted to be HOT not cute!
Rushing around always smiling, laughing personality but I do take life seriously hence my financial success.
Very sturdy, responsible yet can be cheeky and wild at times.
I am very honest person have been told many times I am funny.
Bachelor for life by choice
Been told I am a great catch many times but I rather not be caught
Love to travel, love my freedom LOVE MONEY $$$$$ Ca- CHING!!!
That’s all folks

Stay strong babe Day 7 for me.

LOSER
Reply

Hi Kate,

I hope your well haven’t heard from you for a while, I hope your staying strong with the smoking and gambling. Hope you haven’t taken any offence with the visual descriptions of late.

Wishing you well

kate
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Hi Loser
Thanks for checking – I’m really well thank you …… busy catching up with old friends now my husband is so much better …..spent today in London – we walked 45 mins there and the same back, from a very nice vegetarian indian place – my friends’ fit-bit said we’d burnt 1020 calories ….. so i’m thinking that pretty much burnt up lunch …. good result. Woody the spaniel is gorgeous and less of an escape artist, so no more crawling under fences to try and catch him ( I hope). Hope all is well with you and you stay gamble free

LOSER
Reply

Hi Sexy Eyes, (No not you Jane hahahaha)

When I said Tall, Dark and Handsome it was a figure of speech, so I am now curious how you imagine me to look like. I mean you got Andy’s perfect hair correct lol so let’s see how good your psychic abilities are. As for NIK I imagine him with blonde highlight’s, longer fringe area and floppy hair. So you look like the future queen of England……Interesting
You know I am speechless right now because all I can envisage is you in those boots strutting your stuff down the street with your sexy walk. Excuse me while I go take a cold shower lol
Your right about one thing I am hyper, yet have calmed down over the years as I got older. I love your dad’s saying, live like a millionaire…fresh lobster unreal.
Tonight I am on Day 6 and I have $500 on me from a job I did today YIKES so tempted to go to the casino but I decided to work on my trip instead. I am happy to hear your on Day 11 with no urges, except for the urges you have for me. LOL Hey I saw something on the new’s tonight that they will start to reduce gambling ad’s on TV however it’s only during sport show’s. I don’t watch much sport so that’s no help for me. Isn’t it interesting I didn’t even know what Ladbrokes and William Hill was till i joined this forum and it wasn’t till then that I even became aware of the gambling ad’s on television. The only one’s that tempt me are the casino ad’s. Hey we forgot to describe Mr X Gambler and Duncan. I see Mr X Gambler as every girls dream man, literally tall, dark and Handsome, the silent type. As for Duncan kinda like the boy next door look. Dark brown soft hair with a side part flicked to one side, possible blue eye’s not much facial hair. Almost like a “Ritchie” from Happy day’s but Dark hair. I have decided Kate is medium build, kind face, older but pleasant looking, hazel or green eyes with brown hair style shorter to the shoulder with some soft curls. Hey Game of Thrones coming out in a few months I can’t wait!!!
Stay Strong Joanne even when the urges come!!!

Your King

LOSER
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Hi Andy,
Don’t judge your whole character by one flaw. So your a gambler, ain’t we all? Your clearly not a big let down, here is a women who chose to spend the rest of her life with you (your wife). Addiction is difficult to beat whether it be smoking, alcohol, drugs, overeating or gambling. A lot of people have addictions but they don’t know it. Your making a effort at least shouldn’t that be seen as strength of character? How about the fact that you wised up that you have a problem with gambling? How many poor people are at the casino tonight watching spinning fruit in the hope of winning a feature and all they are doing is making there addiction stronger and there bank accounts lighter? So stay strong maybe work up the courage to tell your wife so she can support and help you. If she controlled all the money then you wouldn’t have anything to gamble right? We tend to turn to gambling to forget our worries of the world, if you can identify your trigger’s then this would be great for your recovery. And if you have a big berk why not start a fitness regime to keep you busy and keep your mind off gambling? I go to the gym and take hikes and it fills in time and clears the mind.
You can do this Andy you and your perfect hair lol

Andy
Reply

hi Loser, yeah i know i shouldn’t judge my whole character by this addiction, It’s just the way I feel at this moment in time, the reason im a big berk is because i go to the gym, I play rugby semi proffessional, spend most of my time in the gym when im not gambling. Sad isn’t it?
Maybe I should tell my wife, I’m really close to, Just afraid on what she will do? Will she be supportive or kick me into touch (no pun intended lol). Maybe its the kick up the backside I need.
Thanks for the advice loser, keep going yourself and let them starve!
All the best

LOSER
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Hi Joanne,
Of course your my number one women (wink wink) lol However who on earth is English Rose and a sentimental Irish girl with a heart of gold????? Please don’t say Jane because she is definitely not my type hahah It appears your weekend has begun and you must be drunk!!! Now Kate on the other hand is a contender lol It’s 2:33am here i cannot sleep ah well. Now please reply to me at the top of the page I am not getting email notifications (most annoying) and searching for your reply is like finding a needle in a hay stack! So your mum thinks she is Kylie Minogue? I guess you will have to dress up if your going to compete with her tight gold shorts lol Your weekend sounds interesting I cannot wait to hear what went on. I am glad my NOOOO worked for you so now I would like you to imagine my handsome but angry steaming red face on the reels if you dare push the spin button. Are you up to Day 9 or 10? Sounds like progress to me. I am all cashed up again oppsie I must go to the bank and make sure I put that so called iron of steel around my potential pokies money lol I might go to Bingo with all the grandma’s and grandpa’s with their false teeth and scavenger free coffee’s. I cannot believe i am there as much as i love it seriously I am too classy for that joint so now I wear my tracksuit when i go I look ridiculous jumping out of my spots car in that gear hahahah I would die if anyone I knew saw me there. Now don’t take a lot of cash with you when you venture out, that way you won’t gamble if your Uncle temps you. Now cmon Joanne it’s time we start racking up days this nonsense has gone on long enough I am sick of this merry go round, time to carve a new path to our new future I don’t want to marry a gambler now hahahahahah (joke) i should be safe this weekend I am busy with that project so I have no fear for the next 5 day’s. I will see my counsellor on Wednesday HOW BORING I sit there nodding my head pretending I am listening but hearing her clock go tick tock, tick tock wondering if the hour has passed for our session to end. So tell me what colour is your hair? Is it straight or wavy? I’m just trying to conjour a image of you, now I always thought you were brunette with wavy hair for some reason 5’6 and pretty slim. No truth be told I thought you were chubby, I imagine Mat to be small, slim, like a little Asian man with brown hair that needs a haircut. Jane I imagined a blonde with a bob hairstyle. Kate hmmmmmm unsure about Kate. How do you think I look Joanne?

Joanne
Reply

Hi Loser,

I hope it’s thoughts of me that are keeping you awake at night! lol I’m Scottish as you know, Kate is English (I think) and Jane is Irish. Funnily, I also see Jane with a bob, although dark not blonde. Every time I read one of her posts she reminds me of a woman I once knew, bob hairstyle, possibly around 5 feet and although not particularly overweight perhaps wide around the hips. I see Kate as slightly older , taller, possibly bigger boned . I see Andy as neat, with perfect hair (don’t ask me why!) NIK , I’m not sure yet, and Mat as Asian, but oddly as quite a big guy, maybe because he does outdoor work. I hope I haven’t started another war! lol

As for me, you’re spookin me out! I am around 5′ 4′, although I never wear flat shoes except for my wellies and my hiking boots! I have to wear 3-4 inch heeled boots, shoes because I like to nip along!! I’ve got a sexy walk! I’m not chubby nor super slender , about average. Cheeky boy! I’ve got long, chestnut brown hair and my eyes are my best feature, hair and eyes similar to the Duchess of Cambridge (married to Prince William, Royal Family). Unfortunately I do not have her height or slenderness ! Only visit a hairdresser about twice a year, (I’m a natural scruff!!) but they do tell me I have a nice ‘kink’ in my hair, so you’re correct it’s not straight just a slight wave. I’m a low maintenance girl, not too concerned with how I look, no money for expensive beauty regimes, I’m too skint! Although I do wear a little eye make-up. lol My nickname in High School was ‘sexy eyes’ lol I have been known to climb the odd Scottish mountain, enjoyed youth hostelling when I was younger hence the hiking boots! The wellie boots are for when I go out to sea with my father, we have a wee fishing boat so we like to try and pot a lobster or catch some langoustines! Fresh lobster straight from the sea, my dad always jokes, we don’t have to be a millionaire to live a millionaire’s life-style! lol I like fashion (clothes/shoes/handbags) hence the visits to the city! I guess I can flip from ‘out-door girl’ to ‘city girl’.

As for you, I see my every fantasy!!! hahahaha Well you did tell me at Hogmanay , you were tall, dark and handsome! I hope you’re not too skinny, I like a guy with a bit of meat on his bones! Although you always strike me as being ‘hyper’, someone who is always rushing around! I don’t really care what you look like, I just see a lovely guy! (I’m being serious).

Anway, I’m doing well, day 11 and no urges. Short on time now, off on Sunday , back next Saturday, so I’ll look forward to catching up with you then. LOL (lots of love) xx

Andy
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Haha “neat with perfect hair” I suppose you are sort of right Joanne. Although I’m 6″2, 16 stone and a big berk in all honesty! Living a lie to my wife and my family and basically a massive let down but hey ho, hard today but still haven’t gambled.
Coming on here helps. Hope you are good Joanne and loser.
All the best

Jane
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Having had urges a few weeks ago, I signed up with the British Casino, never heard of them before so I knew they weren’t on my exclusion list. I didn’t bet with them, because I changed my mind and decided that I would instead tick it off the list, by self excluding. It was quite a performance to self exclude as it required software on my laptop that I didn’t have. Instead of just a simple online request, I had to fill in some form using Office or similar, and my subscription had run out so I couldn’t do it. I asked them via live chat, if I could self exclude in any other way and they said no, it had to be via the form, but that I could select a time out instead, so I did. The most I could time out for was 6 weeks, I think.
I saw today, that it is possible to cancel my time out, and be up and running again within 24 hours. I’ve never come across that before. All my time outs, no matter how short could never be revoked once applied. That’s how I ended up with so many betting sites, moving from one to another. Seems now, they are making it really easy for people who have asked for intervention, to just swing in and change their minds…….like ‘I had a problem, yesterday, but I don’t now, so it’s all good’…. Absolutely ridiculous.

It states…

“TIMEOUT
Please apply a timeout to your account by selecting the appropriate timeout period underneath and click submit. When a timeout is set it is not possible to play and to add funds to your account.

Once a timeout is set it is possible to cancel the timeout which will take 24 hours before the timeout is removed.”

Just been doing some more reading on the terms and conditions and apparently the time out section is not necessarily for problem gamblers. It says…
‘If you do not feel that you have a problem with gambling or an addiction, we strongly advise to use the timeout system as presented above.’
So it seems, they only regard the self exclusion as a means of controlling a gambling problem.

Perhaps we should tell them, that the humble time out is something the majority of people use while trying to control their addiction, especially in the early days, and the main reason for that is because they are not able to fully commit to an exclusion, because they still want to gamble, but they also know full well that they have a problem.
I know this, because this is what I did all the time. Just take a week off here, a week off there, never wanting to really admit that I needed to stop, but at the same time, trying to control it.

I think this is something they really need to address, because it should not be so easy to revoke a request that to me, screams that you need help controlling your gambling. Why? Because people who have a gambling problem ASK for a time out, people who don’t, just take time out THEMSELVES.

mat
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Day 7 I feel much better already, went to the gym, no urges like then when I was gambling almost everyday on a winning streak. I find it easy to walk away and stop for weeks at a time, then I start to believe I can win something once more and almost always I seem to win £500 then I am back the next day winning again and then I gamble and take big risks, once I start I find it impossible to walk away unless I have win and made profit. I relapsed because I believed I can win and wanted to gamble, the key is to accept you can’t win. The last time I lost was all winnings from the week before I didn’t use my money I work for but it still made me upset, once you have it it really is yours but you always want to win more and when you lose you will try to win it back and that’s when to loss of control kicks in and you are losing money you cant afford to lose and machines here make it very easy purposely to lose £50-£100 a spin every 30 seconds and balance of £1000 can disappear in 10 minutes, online casinos are even worse as you cant even see the money and acknowledge how much you lost until there is nothing left.

Jane
Reply

That’s great, Mat. Keep it up. I am working out too. I get quite a kick out of pushing myself in this way and I am motivated enough to keep going once I start. It does my head good to exercise. Hopefully, I can lose a few pounds of weight instead of out of my pocket.

A winning streak is sometimes worse than a losing streak because when you keep losing, you have anger to fuel you into stopping. While we are winning, it gets in your head and torments you every day, partly because you want to play again and partly because you know you will never keep it all. I have had big wins sucker me in to losing thousands of my own money so now I try to remember that a win is just a loss wrapped up in a pretty package.

I have had better days, mentally, when I lost money, than when I was winning, because when I won, I couldn’t focus on anything else except playing again! When I lost money, I would just go into a different way of thinking and be able to stop gambling for a while, with that ‘never again mentality’. When you win, you just can’t leave it alone, even though you know you should quit while you are ahead.
That’s why we have to do all we can to keep ourselves out of the cycle.

All the best, Mat.

loser
Reply

Nik…….
Day 107 that’s great mate well done!
You clearly have let them starve lol

loser
Reply

Hi Joanne,
What do you mean, “Are we good?” Of course we are why wouldn’t we be? I know you like to run away then like Houdini you magically reappear! LOL Don’t worry as much as I travel the world, I would never meet you, so don’t be scared of getting too close. I am glad to hear your reading books and interesting one where the slot is your lover? hahah Well you can push my buttons anytime Joanne. Now I am disappointed to hear you joined the online gambling site. I know you did it to self exclude but your playing with fire here. Better to get a gaming software blocker for your computer and simply throw that email to the junk or block it. What day are you up to now? I really hope you stay on track this time. Surely you could report this website to some body who will deal with them? Anyway I should be safe for awhile I am helping a mate do a big job in there yard I figured I will volunteer just to keep my mind off the urges. It worked too as I woke up having urges and then completely forgot about it all day until I got home and was bored.
Day 3 for me.

Joanne
Reply

Hi LOSER,

Look at you my little ‘Gypsy Rover’ oozing with ‘wisdom’ and ‘sex-appeal’. lol I nearly got tempted by a favourite game when I signed up to those two casinos but your name popped into my head and your great big NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! and I resisted. Hey, you’re my guardian angel! You sound happy and that’s great. Far better for us to have come back to the forum and ‘face the music’ , ! try and sort things out. Just bear in mind that there are 3 girls who care about you here, a romantic Scot, (of course I have to be your number 1 girl) an English Rose and a sentimental Irish girl with a heart of gold!! Hey, you just can’t top British girls . I’m definitely off to pack that suitcase although it may not be tearooms. My mother is young at heart and thinks she is Kylie Minogue so it will be trendy boutiques (Oh God), my bachelor uncle thinks he’s ‘Mr Modern’ and likes his drink so it’ll be trendy bars (heaven help me with those two alcoholics) and of course my uncle likes a punt so it’ll be bookies (so heaven SAVE me). I guess it’s going to be a few days of avoiding each other’s vices and a lot of ‘teasing ‘ one another . It should be interesting. Great to hear from you, keep safe sweetheart.

p.s. day 9 or is it 10

Kate
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Hi Andy. Don’t be too down hearted. Keep heading towards your goal. I think you gave up the cigs too at the same time? I found it really difficult to give up smoking AND gambling at the same time, but once I really had gone through the first few weeks of not smoking, I stopped lapsing with gambling, stopped completely , and am now finding life a lot easier – not tempted to do either . I think giving up smoking is a big adjustment – although you said you had found it easier than not gambling, all sorts of changes are happening in your body and brain. ….and it takes a bit of time for it all to settle. I feel ‘clean’ now – the nicotine and its effects are totally out of my system, and this seems to have made it a lot easier to stay stopped with the gambling. I bet if we looked there are academic studies on this – ‘co-dependent variables in gambling cessation’ or some other complicated title! In fact, I might have a look! All the best

Andy
Reply

Thank you Kate, you talk so much sense. Been off the smokes now for a month. Doing great. Although I am vaping. Just this rotten gambling addiction, I’ll get there eventually.
All the best kate

kate
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Thanks Andy. It is a rotten addiction – but we can do it. Day 86 not smoking and day 28 not gambling for me ….the numbers are starting to build up. I’m now turning my attention to alcohol control ….not stopping, but cutting down ….to Gov max for a woman which is 14 units – the equivalent of 1 double G&T per day. I won’t recognize myself soon – so squeaky clean I’ll have to wear sunglasses indoors! I’m getting a lot of satisfaction now from taking back control in my life ….one day at a time. I’ve got a group of girlfriends, who, for various reasons need to get fitter ….so lots of long walks and sharing tips ( although i still don’t think I can share my secret gambling addiction with them) . I agree, this Forum helps – it’s good to be able to be relatively open about this nasty addiction, and I do enjoy it when there is some lighthearted banter around
All the best ( Kate, 50+, light hair and complexion, biggish frame, has been compared to Diane Keaton in Annie Hall on more than one occasion)

Andy
Reply

Day 9. Let them starve!

Andy
Reply

A fool and his money are soon parted. How apt is that? Really struggling guys, on day 7 after relapsing once more last week.
It seems I will never kick this, i’m trying, really am.

loser
Reply

Andy don’t have access to cash, keep yourself busy, call friends when you have urges to arrange a meet. Rack up those days and it will be easier.

Joanne
Reply

RESPONSIBLE GAMBLING

What the heck does the Gambling Commission do?

I got 2 emails from 2 new casinos inviting me to join ie Smashingcasino and Casino cruise. So I signed up to both with the intention of placing 5 year self-exclusions so that I won’t be tempted to play. Both sites had no responsible gambling sections! Nowhere on the site to set limits, time-outs or self-exclusions. I contacted one of the sites via live-chat to explain and he advised me to send an email. I asked him why he couldn’t place a self-exclusion on my account there and then. He informed me he was not able to do so and to send an email. Delaying tactics if you ask me so that we weaken and get tempted to play. These casinos are getting off with more and more each day if you ask me. The Gambling Commission are about as much good as a chocolate fire-guard! Rant over! I think I’ll get my revenge on Trustpilot lol

NIK
Reply

Nothing as far as I can see Joanne.
I had cause to write to them once over Sky Bet’s iniquitous and unfair bonus conditions. They responded with a sympathetic but utterly useless reply. They don’t appear to have any power.

I am now on day 107 and feeling good.

Remember keep your money – let them starve!

Andy
Reply

Great going NIK, well done and keep it up

Joanne
Reply

Something else which may be of interest with regard to your next book NIK . A new practice which involves a ‘Recovery Agreement’! You make a declaration in writing ‘I hereby confirm I do not have a gambling addiction and request my self-exclusion to be lifted’. You then have to wait a week and the self-exclusion is lifted. I stumbled upon this 6 weeks ago when I chanced my hand via live chat to have a self-exclusion lifted on one of my old accounts. Of course the gambling addict in me was delighted, it cost me £4325. (wages, overdraft and some accumulated money ) I’ve just received an email from one of the casinos I wrote to last night offering me a Recovery Agreement , less than 24 hours after requesting a self-exclusion! Unbelievable!

The UK Gambling Commission do not care a jot for the gambling addict , they just issue these rogue casinos a ‘Licence to Con’

Well done on your days, I’ll be in the queue for your forthcoming book.

NIK
Reply

Thanks for this Joanne.
I have made some progress with it (it’s great to turn to when the urges comes on) and am actually working on it now, and I know where it’s going, but it won’t be appearing anytime soon. Am aiming for July / August, but it could be quite a bit later. It’s the busiest time of the year for my work so I have to fit it in around that.
The stuff you can discover about gambling addiction is virtually endless!
Thanks for your support.

Let ‘em starve!

john
Reply

Hi i came on site becouse of you jane becouse before i just seeyour stories and make how gambling is a devil once i saw your storie when you was gambling on and your mother and your father was down stairs wating for you to make there meal and you blow of all your money that time i sad to myself that you had a big problem and i am a lot happy that you stoped for a long time and hope you will never gamble agiam jane you are in the right way keep going in the best way wiyhout gambling see how celebriets lost all there money and dont have nothing now living on the strreets thats how how gambling is like i sad before i lost almost€350 000 00 but never mind i stopped gambling and feel free now hope you stay on the best road like me we can do this jane

Jane
Reply

Hi, John. Yes, I have a lot of sadness and a lot of regrets, like all of us on here, but it is never too late to turn things around. We can make a very bad situation a lot worse by gambling ourselves to death, or we can say enough is enough and stop. It is very hard to stop as you know John, because you have to learn to forgive yourself and let go of all those losses and accept that it is in the past. If we can do that, then we really can win. I am trying to forgive myself and leave my gambling in the past. I know I made a lot of mistakes and I am lucky that I have a lovely family and a lot of good reasons to make this work. My glass is half full now, not half empty and that is the way I have learnt to look at my life. I know that I still have a long way to go, especially with the depression I have some days, but it is possible to have a life without gambling and I hope we can all achieve that, through this site and through support from those around us.
Wish you well, John and thank you for being there. Enjoy your day. :)

Joanne
Reply

BOOK

Overcoming Gambling – Philip Mawer (easy to read , similar style to A Carr’s book) available on Amazon

I’ve been reading this book and the author refers to the slots as our ‘lovers’! and the casinos as the ‘twilight zone’ ie the place we want to go to lose ourselves and block out the world. This resonated with me because I always play the slots in the small hours of the morning and maybe for us girls who have been let down by life or men that ‘slots’ have in a sense become our substitute ‘lovers’! Time we girls got our act together and kick these lovers ie slots out of our beds otherwise they will strip us bare and I’m talking cash not clothes! lol lol

Girls (and guys!) if your passing the hours away playing slots because you’re feeling lonely or let down , do yourself a favour and stop NOW because you will end up with nothing or worse. Money in the bank does offer you financial security. What’s worse than ‘lonely’ , ‘lonely and feeling insecure’.

LOSER Are we good? Trip is next Sunday, got my dates muddled up, shows how interested I am in the trip! lol

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