I am the mother of a 24 year old male. His gambling addiction is like torture for me. To see someone you love with so much potential become an incapable addict is like slow death. He has gambled for at least 6 years. He dropped out of university with a few months to the end after 4 years fighting the addiction. I have ranged from anger and misunderstanding to empathy and support in how I deal with his problem. I can honestly say his journey has unravelled emotions in me I didn’t know existed. I absolutely hate and despise the action of gambling. I do not despise or hate my son. I have come to realise he is incapable of thought. I have a suspicion he is also an undiagnosed bipolar personality as predeceding the gambling addiction he suffered with impulsiveness/ compulsions etc. for me the situation is now impossible. All his family has ‘bailed him out’ over the years. He owes thousands and thousands to loan companies and he has lied and cheated all who know him. Even to the point where he now has no realisation of the truth because he has no vision and cannot see. I have spoken to the family GP twice for help but all they say is he has to ask for help. That isn’t going to happen because he is in denial like all addicts. So I am stuck. I have to watch him deteriorate and malfunction. I have to listen to the tales of him wanting to kill himself by throwing himself of a bridge. I wonder then if some passer by will save him? And if at that crisi point he will have access to treatment. I have read many stories from addicts and m I am so fearful that my son will end up stealing / committing fraud, ending up in jail, police record, homeless, loveless. Sometimes I am mortified that he cannot see the hurt the habit creates and how destructive addiction can be, but then I realise he cannot see, he cannot think. I am so frustrated by the overwhelming social acceptance and promotion of gambling. There is nothing to support the gambling addict (only one NHS clinic doing great work). I spoke to the community mental health team who specialise in helping addicts and they almost laughed when I requested help for his gambling addiction. Why? Because they only fund alcohol and drug treatment. That is simply because society and more importantly our medical professional are totally unaware of the physiological and psychological impact of gambling. Please write to your MPs, talk to your friends, shout loud from the highest hills about gambling addiction. It is alive and kicking, on the increase, out of control and worst of all highly promoted on every form of media in the UK to the point that it has become a normalised pastime. I feel I have lost my son to this addiction. I will fight to the end to save him and hope others will join forces to raise awareness about gambling addiction and to change the ‘normalisation’ of this activity through advertising etc. the ONLY winners are the gambling monopolies who are making billions of profit from addicts.


I didn’t gamble until I gave up full time employment to look after my elderly mum who is housebound and has dementia. Her needs are such that I can’t even focus on reading a book BUT I could hit return on an online gambling site. As the isolation and boredom set in I became hooked on ‘my escape’…………I thought it would solve all of my problems and I’d win big, freeing me and affording help for mum.
With 2 years I lost my savings and maxed a credit card I cannot repay. Today I mailed the gambling site, explaining that I had developed an addiction and requesting that my account be permanently closed immediately. They replied offering me options, including a short break from the site!!!!!! I will NEVER gamble again. They are scum bags.
As I am now in financial crisis I strangely feel as though I’m coming out of a very dark place……one I will not return to. I have no means of paying this debt and cannot get a job due to my mum needing 24/7 care. I am now looking through my things to see if there is anything I can sell to make next months credit card payment……….I keep telling myself that things could be worse…and I refuse to live in the’s gone and good riddance……I’m looking forward and know I’ll see a better day.


am Albert muthungu a Kenyan 20 yrs old. i started gambling last year in January 2014 when i realized how gambling can give you quick easy money. i am a university student at meru university pursuing a degree in computer science where i was introduced to gambling by one of my classmates. litle did i know that gambling could later ruin me. i had the privilege to be employed in a local secondary school as a part time teacher but i gambled all my salary and ended up loosing all my salary. as we resumed school after a long holiday this April 2015, i have gambled all my government loan for paying school-fees. in a weeks that is 13th of April, main exams are to commence. i don’t have even a penny to eat. i purely rely on my girl friend of whom am afraid to disclose my life to her since she can cease her help to me. my parents no longer sponsor me any more since they know i acquire a government loan and also believe that i have enough money saved from my teaching job i acquired during the just ended long holiday. i don’t know where to start or to end. am far away from home and am a really a big introvert having nobody to share my problem with. and the worst thing i dead is stealing 3000 ksh from my girlfriends phone through mobile money transfer. and yesterday the 7th of April, she contacted the network provider and now she knows am the one who stole her money. she no longer trust me. just help me please. today since morning i have been finding on painless effective ways of ending my life, i thing using potassium cyanide is the best but where will i access it. then rat rat is the only readily available option.


I never gambled until Dec 2013. I was waiting for my wife at a restaurant near the casino, she was parking her car and I wandered into the casino for a few minutes. I had about $10 in change so I figured, what the hell, and popped a few dollars into a Poker machine. After only a few minutes I’d won over $100 and it ended up paying for our dinner that night. My wife and I were delighted at my good fortune.

After that I found out about online casinos. Got hooked on trying to come up with an automated system to beat roulette (it was great fun designing the systems). Had a few systems that looked good but obviously there is no winning system. That’s when I started chasing my losses and I had blown 10s of thousands within a month or so.

Then I started on blackjack online, and found an online casino that took large wagers. On one crazy day I started gambling insanely and was up all the money I had lost and a few thousand extra. I should have stopped then and there but I kept thinking, just a few thousand more, soon I started losing and started betting huge to recover. Before I knew it, I’d lost all my winnings and deposits. I think I even placed a single bet of $20,000 that day.

By this time I think I was $70,000 down and it’d only been a few months.

That’s when I knew I had a problem and stopped for a month or so. But eventually I stumbled on a nice looking site that had blackjack and roulette unlike any other site I’d been too. I started playing and I started winning. Occasionally I’d lose and just bet bigger to recover. In the end I actually made about 4,000 profit at that casino after tying up around $15,000 to do so. This site didn’t allow you to reverse withdrawals so each time I’d win a lot I’d slap in a withdrawal and it was a sure thing. Unfortunately that site closed down (when I was still waiting for my winnings – I did get them in the end).

By this time I was close to $100,000 down since I’d begun. I stopped again for a while but found a site that allowed small bets so I thought I’d just bet small and have fun. This lasted about a day as I quickly got carried away. At one point I was 17,000 up and kept saying to myself. Now’s the time to stop, you will lose it all very soon, but the site allowed cancellation of withdrawals for a day or so, and before I knew it, I’d lost the lot.

Each time I sign up to a site, I go through the same cycle, lose everything and then ban myself from the site. I cool off for a few days and it begins again. Some sites I lose only a few hundred dollars, others I lose thousands.

Now only a few days ago I found another site, and just started winning and winning. Every time I had a bit of bad luck I’d just cancel my withdrawals and recover. This went on for 4 days of very good luck but not a single withdrawal was completed. I suddenly started to downward spiral at about 18,000 profit, so I started betting over 1,000 on numerous blackjack hands, and just kept losing. I had 2,000 left and slapped a $1,000 bet on a slot machine and it won me like almost $20,000. I was laughing that I recovered and kept saying to my self, self exclude for a few days, allow the withdrawals to complete, you’re done, but I ended up making a few more bets, and bad luck kicked in right away. Before I knew it, I was back to nothing. Self excluded from this latest site and I’m just hoping I’ve about excluded myself from every online casino by now.

I only ever told my wife about the big wins, never the losses. She thinks we’re $40,000 up, not down more than $100,000. I find the gambling very stressful, but I keep dreaming of making a lot of money so I can by a new house. I KNOW gambling is not a way to make a living, that you basically will lose whatever money you bring to the table and it’s just a bit of fun if you’re prepared to lose that amount, but I always lapse into thinking I can win.

My wife and I already own our own home outright, but my wife is a chronic hoarder. Our house is invested with rodents, there’s rubbish everywhere and we have massive fights every time I try to clean up anything, and my wife won’t clean anything up, she just keeps buying more useless items. I literally have to walk sideways to move around the house. Some rooms haven’t been opened for years because of stuff piled so high against the doors (our young daughter can’t even get into her own room and has to sleep with us). This is why I started wanting to win at gambling. It was the dream of being able to just buy another house and start again, I can’t believe it’s unlocked the insane problem gambler inside me. Even when I have stopped gambling for a few days, I just walk through my house and I need to escape. Unfortunately the gambling is destroying any chance of escape as it slowly erodes our savings.

This is the first time I’ve discussed this problem, even if it is anonymously on a forum. My life should be awesome right now, a great job, a lovely wife and talented daughter, but between my gambling and my wife’s hoarding, we’re really destroying our lives. We still have a lot of savings, so if I stop right now and accept my losses will never be won back (but earned back over time at my job), I should be able to just on with my life, but I always think less of my issue after time and it all starts again…

I just hope this is the last time I even look at a gambling site.


I have been gambling since I was around 18 years old. Like most guys of my age at that time it started with football accumulators which then spiralled into Roulette, then any form of gambling I could get my hands on.
I have battled with this addiction on and off for the past 3 years. I went over 1 year without a bet. I told all my family, friends and partner. Then it happens. The day when you bet again. It wasn’t a huge sum, probably £5-£10, it may have even been on the weekly lottery. I felt I couldn’t tell anyone, not after all that I’d put them through previously. So the betting carried on. As time past, I gained the courage to tell people close to me I’d relapsed. Everyone supported me and I was gamble free. This cycle has repeated itself 4 or 5 times now.
I know I am running out of time and patience of those around me. I cannot carry on like this and most importantly, I don’t want to! None of us WANT to.
So, over the last few weeks I have been in touch with a gambling counselling clinic called breakeven who work with GamCare. They are the only service within a 30 mile radius and I live on the border of South London. They are so oversubscribed it is impossible to fit me in for a telephone assessment. Is this the sorry state of affairs the UK offers up for gambling counselling? I believe there is a a huge gap in the system to help problem gamblers. With no disrespect to GA, there should surely be more available than a group meeting in an old community hall.
I will try to focus on myself for now, one day at a time they say. Although it is obvious to us all that more needs to be done to help us in our time of need.


It all started with poker, seeing it all on tv, becoming famous and a lot of potential to win a lot of money in a short amount of time. Winning wasn’t easy but I did pretty well, but wasn’t making enough so I started going to the casino. While waiting to play poker because there was a list of people waiting, started playing roulette. The amount of money I had on me or had access to was not a big fortune so I had nothing to lose. At the time I really believed I can win, despite the odds, I had luck and was winning small amounts which made me thing with more money I will win more. But with more money, your strategy changes and I was losing always. I started getting loans, from 1500-10,000, at the age of 19 I had over 10 loans and credit cards combined, totalling 30k. Guess what ? In a matter of weeks, I lost it all at roulette. I eventually sold my car for 2k which was not much and took the bus to play poker this time and make it all back. Please keep in mind every trip to the casino was 300km there and back. so imagine how many trips, how many hours of dreaming big and driving – a total waste of my life. But to continue with the story, I ended up playing poker, won 1500 within half an hour, took a break… and went to the roulette table, and lost it all. I somehow managed to convince my girlfriend at the time, to sell her car in order to pay bills, I did, and guess what I lost that too! Never repaid her, lost her too, she is well, married and has a kid on the way. So every time for the past 11 years I have gambled away every penny I ever made, not spending money on my eyes (which I use contacts), on my teeth (haven’t been to a dentist in 7 years), gambled away another girlfriends money, and lost her too. Decided not to make another girlfriend for many years not to destroy her life too, so going to prostitutes become only available and quick option. Borrowed money from friends, all for my personal needs but I somehow managed it to gamble every time. In the last 6 months, I have worked my ass off different type of jobs, hard labour, and made over 15k, bought a car, and wanted to move because I am staying with family. ( I am 30 now). Guess what ? I have lost it all again, in a matter of days! combination of roulette and sports betting. My heart goes out to all of you, and speaking out of experience it is very very hard. What will follow, I don’t know, all I know is that I dedicate my life all the way and will never stop betting on sports and playing occasional poker. Roulette that did all the damage are the worst and I know I am able to stop.


I have been gambling for over 10 years of my life. Im 29 this year and because of gambling, i have suffered from depression, selflessness and suicidal.

At this moment,I feel that all hope is gone for me. Im fighting a losing battle. I cant win this battle because after each bailout that i HAD, the pain that was suffered during those times, i am so sure that i wouldnt let it happen again. But……

Everytime i abstain from gambling, its only for a short period. I would start making healthy leisure bets when i thought i was in “control”. And its just a matter of time, the debts piled till i wish i could get a bailout and start a fresh.

I need help. Advises needed.


i have been gambling for 10 years on the pokies. I estimate I’ve lost 220,000k plus of my own money in that time, even more if i count what i ”won”. i feel sick from it and will have to confess to my mother tomorrow in order to have her ‘bail me out’. i am terrified. i have tried counselling, gamblers anonymous, self exclusion, nothing’s worked i always end up back there. i’m going to have to ask my mother my manage my finances. so humiliating at 33 years old. i don’t have, nor have never had, a car, or own anything of any value, due to gambling, intimate relations have been destroyed due to gambling. i’ve wasted so much of my life. losing the time is worse than the money, i could have been living rather than spending the last 10 years obesssing over my next gamble, how to survive without money till next pay, get more money to gamble etc.

the problem is i’ve been reading these sites for years and i always found someone worse off than me and that would somehow justify continuing to gamble. my only advice to people that haven’t been gambling as long as me…it WILL get worse. stop now while you can.


I should have added that i have thought of suicide, prostituting myself, crime to continue to gamble. this is so humiliating and i have lost all dignity and self worth.


Hi Helga, my name is Andrei I’m compulsive gambler like you.Just gone 15 days today gambling free.Hope will keep it that way.B strong life is beautiful please don’t do any stupid things.


I’m a 25 female gambler and can’t stop I’ll stay away for a few months or so then I’ll go back and do it. been gambling Now since September 2013.I hate the disapointing my mother causing her stress because I keep doing it.she can’t understand why I do it she says I’ve got everything in life.


I have gambled since i was about 12, i started on fruit machines with birthday money, christmas money and paper / milk round money. When i started full time work i then progressed onto the high street book makers with no clue doing stupid bets on horses and dogs. I used to beg for money from relatives to pay my rent and promise to pay them back and never did on time or never the full amount. In my twenties i started to make pretty good money and gambled that every month along with loans and overdrafts aswell. I used to get palpatations the week of my payday and always booked my payday off as a holiday and had the same routine, pull out all my wages roughly 3-4k and stand in the book makers all day and hopefully win or have enough to go to the casino later in the afternoon. I married the best woman in the world who has been more than patient with me putting up with the losses, lies and shattered dreams. I almost always until recently been a binge gambler where i am okay for a few months and then start small and then end up loosing thousands. I have taken my 4 yr old and 10 yr old at the time saying i was away to take them out and had them left in a car for 2 – 3 hrs while i played roullete in the book makers !!! Up until last month i had zero debt but now have almost 50k in loans…………………… I feel so so stupid and if i had the strength and courage would almost certainly take my own life and wish everyday that i am killed in a crash etc. I am on the way to accepting this situation and would hop[e that i can kick it for good. Goverment have to step up though and do their bit. I feel you should have to be a member to gamble at any book makers just as online. This way you can self exclude for life !!!!


I started gambling when I was 16 as they never asked me for I’d in Ladbrokes (their mistake) I carried on like all the rest of us winning here losing there until ovcourse as it always does spiral out of control my first big loss was when I was 18 I promised my girlfriend I’d take her some were nice for her birthday when I got payed so I had my £200 standing at the bus stop waiting to go get her and thought looking at the bookies across the road ahh what’s £20 I went on to win £800 plus still had £180 I could have give. My girlfriend the best birthday of her life but no that little prick in your head that won’t let you leave didn’t let me leave until I had lost every penny and missed the bus so I stole money from my mum and dad because I couldn’t face them and ran away for 2 months lost my girlfriend lost my job lost my family and they don’t want me back an I only blame myself so now I’m only 20 live in a hostel am on benifits have no friends drink a lot and think about suicide everyday so if your reading this DONT GAMBLE YOU WILL DESTROY YOUR LIFE


Letter to the Senet Group from Tony:

What I find deeply troubling is the laissez-faire attitude within the industry to problem gamblers like myself.

10 years ago I gambled almost every minute of every day across multiple platforms incl. online, mobile, FOBTs, etc.

Today I am managing to abstain perhaps 350 out of 365 days in a year. When I do relapse though I blow everything I can get my hands on. Some c£15,000 in the last four months. (all funded via loans)

After years of my moods being a direct correlation to wins / losses (eg high / low mood) I do struggle to stay on an even keel. In addition I feel I don’t fit into society anymore. I don’t own anything, I have huge debts, I’m terrified of not being able to pay the next rent payment, I’m insecure / low self esteem. All of this is largely an output of 30+ years gambling addiction.

Does anybody within this industry care about the human cost of your products? I don’t think so. This industry you’ve stepped into is harming a lot of people.

What would you suggest someone in my position should do?

Best Regards,


Maverick Litchfield-Kelly

I am just starting my recovery. I am so low. have had a compulsive gambling habit for 3 years on and off, but had always had run ins with compulsively gambling over last 20 years, though never saw that. Also have had problems with drugs and substances. Am about to lose my business, my wife and child. Feel so low. Is there anyone there who has recovered from this terrible illness, and gone on to rebuild their lives? I would really like some solid advice right now from someone who has done it. I know we can all recover if we want to, and I want to. I am seeing a Gamcare counsellor on Monday for the start of my sessions, and might go on the Gordon Moody retreat if I can afford the time off work. I need to get debt advice. This has gone on too long.

I wish everyone out here the best for a solid lifelong recovery. Mine is just starting – if I continue with this, maybe I can have a normal life again.

Right now I hate myself for what I have thrown away, but I have to accept that I did this, no one else. It is my responsability. No one else to blame but me.

Let’s keep this forum positive, with tales of recovery and success and help others along the way. Together we are stronger.

Andrew Rossiter (@Andyrossco)

I have lost many thousands on online gambling. How can credit card company’s extend agreed credit card limits to accommodate gambling. I had a credit card limit of £8000 . but in one night I managed while drunk to gamble £13,000 on the same card. The card company Barclays did this without any proof I could afford to pay back this money. I am now in an agreed repayment plan after taking my case to the financial ombudsman, whole ruled in favour of the bank. It seems credit card company’s are blatantly encouraging this practice especially with gambling sites. If I tried to go over my credit limit in a shop I know they would prevent me doing so, as previous experience in the past. So why do they allow online gambling over credit ? They have no recourse and just say you spent the money and you have to honour it.
They knew I was gambling on a online gambling site and still let my credit go on and on.
This surely is the worst type of miss selling ever. Forget PPI the government should take a look at how much banks are making from this practice.
I think the UK should do as the Americans and ban the use of credit cards on gambling sites. They obviously see it has a major problem to ban this practice and stop credit card company’s making huge profits from this.



I, like all of you, have a gambling problem (online roulette). I can’t even tell you how much I’ve lost because I don’t actually know. If I’d never gambled, let’s just say that myself and my husband would be quite well off.

I’m at the stage where I can still bail myself out (most of the time). I don’t have much debt but that’s only because I’ve had a lucky spell lately and kept some control (by that I mean losing everything I had and spending a whole month winning it back, just, and paying off my dues). I am very much in the damage limitation stage and the stage where I need to see that life will be exciting without gambling.

I have been caught up in this for 3 years now on and off. I’ve self excluded from many sites but I remain loyal to one. I am going to go and self exclude right now. I never keep winnings and I have zero control. It would be lovely to know where I am week to week as I work hard and my time and money aren’t used well.

I hope all of you get better soon or if you’re recovering already, stay well. This illness is horrendous and protection is needed


I have reached rock bottom. I couldn’t go with my wife and children to my sister in laws yesterday due to shame. On the 23rd of December I finally faced up to my actions and went to a police station to make a statement. Interestingly, I was asked to return in the morning. I insisted on seeing an officer as I felt I may either change my mind or do something drastic.
My confession to the police was easier than the one I had made to my wife some 20 minutes earlier.
I had stolen around £20,000 from the credit card of the company I was working for. This money was gambled on online roulette.
I had stolen the money to try to repay money borrowed from a friend. I lost that money on a mixture of in-play football betting and on line roulette.
I suffer from bipolar disorder and am in many ways the perfect client for betting companies. Impulsive, easily addicted, atheist and detached from consequences.
I take full responsibility for my actions, even though I consider myself to be suffering from mental illness.
What angers me is that the betting companies are completely immune from blame legally. At one point I had “withdrawn” £16,000 and left myself with £1000 in my betting account. I needed £22,000 to get clear of my debt. I knew my crime would be discovered, but I was desperate to repay what I had begged, borrowed and, eventually, stolen.
I lost the £1000. I reversed the withdrawal and tried to replenish the £1000. Within 20 minutes my life had fallen in around me as I lost the £16,000.
Looking back, a few things strike me as obvious. Winning was not the problem. The problem was holding onto the winnings for long enough for them to matter. I believe that the betting companies should be forced to do several things. First a basic psychometric test before accepting new accounts. Second, withdrawals should be immediately final and irreversible. Third, it should be possible to transact on your winnings immediately, just like PayPal or Neteller. If this had been the case then I honestly believe that I would have settled at least some of my debts with the £16,000 before embarking on any further risk. The biggest thing that they can do, however, is admit that they are profiting from addiction in the same way as cigarette manufacturers are. I never had one call or email or even a pop up warning as I ploughed thousand after thousand into the account and lost it. These organisations are largely self regulated and lack any social responsibility. I will face the consequences of my actions. I will tell my story to warn others.
What will the betting companies do? Smile and bank the money.


I’m writing this as my life disintegrates around me. I’m 37 and have been gambling for most of my adult life.
After living overseas for a number of years I developed a gambling addiction and as a result became more reclusive. Thinking I was escaping the problem, myself and partner decided to return to the UK. This has only made matters worse as the FOBTs have destroyed me. I am clinging to my life with my finger tips and last Friday had very very dark thoughts. I’ve had counselling, attended GA and have had times where I haven’t gambled for months. Once I relapse life folds on itself. My family has had enough, my partner certainly has and I don’t see a way out. I have a good job but somehow find myself in £30k of debt. It is hard this ever getting better, but I have to believe it can be beaten or there is no point.

Paulo Lycee

When I was a boy and good at maths, I realized that gambling was basically all a con from basic probability theory and avoided it totally – very rational. When I was then an adolescent, for whatever reason one day in an arcade I decided to play a fruit machine and got this strange irrational feeling to carry on gambling. There it was and Id crossed the line, moved from clearly seeing that gambling was a bad ‘box of tricks’ and to stay away from, to moving into that box and being stuck in their for a lifetime. Its a strange thing, substanceless, but like a computer algorithm it always stays in the brain waiting to be retriggered when it gets the opportunity, its almost impossible to remove it from the mind. Well I live with it as an adult…


Where to start, read every story here and know exactly what everyone has gone or is going through, love to everyone who has suffered through gambling.

As they tell people at GA meetings, the amounts we have gambled are not important, so I won’t go into that.

I had a very good job working in media at a popular broadcaster with a decent salary (my dream job), like most people I used gambling as an escapism, at first harmless fun. And as with most people took a turn for the worst, lied to get money, no contact with my family for 18 months and am currently of no fixed abode sleeping on a friends floor, in a place I don’t want to be but have no choice.

Want to get into rehab, have applied but can’t seem to pull my head out the sand to follow up, although I know that is what I need to do.


Have a look on the Gordon Moody association’s website, they have rehabilitation and on going support. Give it a go, you have nothing to lose.


Thank you, yes have already applied and need to do follow up phone call, it’s the talking which is the hardest part, problem is I am staying on a friends camp bed at the moment, in a full house so it’s really difficult to get any privacy, and I currently don’t have a mobile with credit. Am going to try and speak with the lady at Gordon Moody this week, I really need to.

Mr x Gambler

Quote of the day: Stop looking for happiness in the same place you lost it!


My name is Caroline, I am a compulsive gambler, I am 36 year old and a mother of one.. I have always enjoyed gambling, but after a few issues in life I took escapism in gambling, I have a criminal record now, I have destroyed relationships , lied and had a mental breakdown. Gambling is not socially accepted as an addiction or illness, but for the past 100 days, I have woke up wondering how I can live with this for the rest of my life, I believe in complete abstinence, but it’s not as easy as people think, gambling is everywhere, it supports charities, it supports many sporting a activities, the government make undisclosed monies off of it.. I live everyday one day at a time as the only people who uunderstand me are gamblers themselves, I embrace the support of GA, but I do believe that there is an answer and there is away out of this evil place, but just for today I will not gamble.. there is hope out there for everyone xx


My Dad was always a gambler I grew up with him constantly rocking on his chair anxiously watching the sport. When I turned 18 I started to gamble and watched the sports with my Dad and had a lot of fun, I didn’t really mind losing because I’d win more than I lost and it wasn’t a problem at this time I could just shake it off.

A few months down the line my girlfriend left me, she was my first love and it left me heavily heartbroken it wasn’t due to gambling that she removed me from her life it was due to the death of her Mum and a lot off other personal problems. I didn’t know what to think I didn’t know what to do. I just couldn’t think about it.

I realised that if I put a bet on the sport then I wouldn’t be thinking about my life and everything that happened to my exs mother and our relationship. But instead I’d be zoned into the sports only caring about my bet.

After just landing myself a new job at a bank I went down this route for about 6 months and gambled my whole salary away and all my savings probably about £5000-6000. It didn’t help my situation. Not one bit I just became a mess at the workplace and I am fortunate enough to off still kept my job somehow.

Gambling is out of control and for those like me with addictive personalities it is a life ruiner. Every time I’d get the train to work I’d think about throwing myself under it instead. We need regulations in this industry because it is ruining peoples life’s and it doesn’t matter about ones intelligence levels if you catch the gambling disease that will eat out your mind and turn you into a horrible person no matter how moral you are at heart or how smart you are.

If there’s anything I can do to support this group then let me know, because I want to help!


Ive been gambling since teenage years in amusement arcades in the great british seaside resort I grew up in. Mates did it, lots of them. It was fairly harmless on the whole, but I realize I crossed the all important line with it back then. 20’s were dormant with lots of other distractions, but it came back to me in my 30’s when I began earning more money. Its there and always will be there, my old ‘profile’. Bit of forced abstinence for a few weeks, a few small bets with typically a minor winning run, then thwumpppp all in and a big hole in my finances followed by regret, remorse and reparations. My old mind is so wired for it all. Those bloody ‘pokie” machines are the worst, they tag so perfectly onto my punting ways. Ive tried many many things to quit, thought I was getting there after 3 months or something away, but then it always gets back. I live with it.

Simon Paxton

I didn’t start gambling till my late 20’s, more by circumstance than anything else. I was doing nightwork with a big gambler and it was the world cup and got in the habit of meeting up at bookies before watching a match before work. Over the coming years it developed into an online pastime and was something I could run away into and lose myself when things weren’t going my way in other areas of my life. I was earning good money and had big ideas to become a professional gambler and I started betting larger amounts. when it inevitably all started going wrong, I was chasing larger and larger amounts and my finances were spiralling out of control. I was living a solitary life, living in squalor in my home which I was now paying nothing towards and lying to and ignoring anybody’s attempts to talk to me. my house eventually got repossessed and I moved into my ex-wife and daughters house amid a bed of lies, not wanting to admit the truth to anyone and still believing that gambling would eventually sort everything out. I began embezzling money from my ex, stole my 13yr old daughters bank card and eventually got caught out. my parents bailed me out of that situation and within weeks I disappeared and was back to my selfish lifestyle, lying, stealing and essentially homeless. my isolation became worse and when I’d lost my last penny for the millionth time and had no-one and nowhere to go, I attempted to take my own life. I was unsuccessful and started out with good intentions for a better life, but even this was not enough of a wake up call. the cycle began again and I ended up street homeless in london, living an entirely dishonest and illegal life until the time was right for me to say enoughs enough and that I wanted my life back. I was very lucky that within 10 days of making this decision, I was given a bed at a residential rehab for gambling addiction, and having completed the three month program, am now in a halfway house adjoining this facility rebuilding my life and relationship with my daughter and looking forward to a brighter, gambling free future.


I am 21 years old I started gambling when I was 17/18 it has ruined my life completely! I need someone to talk to but no one is around there is no help


Gambled since I was 18. Struggled to leave the bookies the first time I went in.

Decent job, young family and work away a lot.

Estimate I’ve lost 40k over 15 years. Losing 50 quid was a lot to lose in the early days. Recently have lost a grand in 1 day on FOBTs and anything else I could bet on.

Only my brother knows – he helped me 3 yrs ago but doesn’t know I relapsed after 18 months clean.

Have gone 2 months without betting – am taking it a day at a time.

Lucky to have no debt and on the face of it a nice life. Would have a nicer life if it wasn’t for losing my spare cash for years.

Could relapse any time – even if I stay away years and years. Never underestimate the power of this addiction.

I am one of the lucky ones.

Mr Gambler

How are you doing Vince?


I gambled over a period of a few years, Got really serious in 2011 – 2012, I lost over £300.000 online, playing live roulette. Lost everything I had, Even now it’s a real struggle to get back any dignity. It produces a feeling of total helplessness which lasts for years after.

As soon as society gets to know what you have done there are many obstacles, all trust is gone.

It is a very difficult road back.

Responsible Gambling needs more strict rules and regulations.

I complained to P-P , who, at the time let me override my responsible gambling limits by means of a simple phone call to customer services.I had set the limits online, but the discretion to override these is with the account manager.

Even in their guidelines and rules, customer services were not allowed to override the limits, but they did.
P- P even changed their published guidelines after my case.

The Gambling commission are no help, they have no powers, only there to give advice to both parties.

P-P returned about 20% of the funds they allowed me to deposit over my responsible set limits as compensation , but refused to accept they had worked outside their own rules as it was my request to override my limits.

I have not gambled since and will never again.


Hi, I have had a similar issue with Paddy Power recently having self excluded myself as a problem gambler in 2013 and then gaining access again and losing over £100k in a month which effectively was my bonus for the entire year on a net basis. I’m a banker in the City. I want to expose this and would be interested in having a chat with you.


Johhny I have no idea who your post is referring to but this is a positive site which we should all be encouraging each other to stop not to say, ” anyways you’ll soon be back on them mark my words seems you cant stop thinking about them.”
So negative….

Mr x Gambler

As far as i understand this site was created by a ex gambler. Which comments do you believe they remove?

Mr x Gambler



Oh no my name came up as LOST. I’m not lost I’m LOSER lol but Loser no more in 2017.


P.S. And finally, the concern that I hope you will give the greatest attention to. I realise that I may have caused offence to others but there is one word that has deeply upset me and that is the use of the word ‘simpleton’. I realise that it was used in a ‘knee jerk’ reaction and I probably deserved it! I do not wish to expand on the reason I find it offensive but I trust you will not permit the use of this word on your forum again.

Happy to be on my way.


LOSER you are the CONFLICT, people here have problems, addiction all you do here is start fights tell me why? why can’t you make a normal post, why do you have to be always right and say the last word you little man behind your computer why can’t you say something positive?
I am really down at the moment but all I see is your malicious posts. But I am 100% sure you will not get it and attacking me. If you want to fight with people go to a boxing club or something.


Then don’t reply because clearly you have nothing to say except more childish comments, which accuse me of being childish. Stop projecting your own insecurities on me.

Prolonging conflict? Are you for real?
You caused the conflict! There you go again, stirring up trouble and then trying to pass the blame on to me.

Focus on your days.


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